In an unprecedented move, 13-year-old Brandon “Tired Bones” Hayden announced yesterday that he will be stepping down from his longstanding position as Commander and Chief of Chores. Citing reasons of fatigue, mental decline, and bad golf scores. Brandon does not have the power to appoint his successor but since he only has one sibling, his 10 year old sister Carmella is the only logical choice given such short notice.

The decision came after months of speculation and whispers around the dinner table about Brandon’s ability to maintain the rigorous standards of chore duty established during his tenure. Neighbors and family members alike have noted his frequent confusion, increase in naps and tendency to stare blankly at the wall.

Carmella, who has been serving as the backup chores officer, expressed her readiness to take on the new role. “I’ve been in training for years,” she said “I know I have some orthopedic shoes to fill, but I’m confident I can make our household clean again.”

Read the rest of this satire news article and more at TattletaleTimes.com

You are viewing a single thread.
View all comments
17 points

It’s odd that the Biden-Harris sign on the fridge (besides being outdated) is so sharply in focus compared to other things at that distance.

permalink
report
reply
19 points

I think it’s edited on to the AI image after generation.

permalink
report
parent
reply
2 points

Whoever did it is absolutely terrible or simply careless. I’m lousy at Photoshop, but even I know how to blur something so it matches the sharpness of objects around it.

permalink
report
parent
reply
-3 points
*

They’re clearly too cheap to pay any sort of artist.

permalink
report
parent
reply
4 points
*

Maybe they manually edited that in. I doubt that image generators would already have those in their training material and also would randomly add those to images.

permalink
report
parent
reply

The Onion

!theonion@midwest.social

Create post

The Onion

A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.

Great Satire Writing:

Community stats

  • 5.2K

    Monthly active users

  • 900

    Posts

  • 11K

    Comments