Similar story here. Asperger’s runs on both of my parents’ sides of the family. In addition Dad has ADHD and mom has BPD. I ended up with the Autism+ADHD combo with sprinkling of CPTSD on top. I don’t even know where the neurological problems end and the psychological problems begin.
Have not talked to either in well over a decade.
I read that adhd families are way often structured in very unhealthy was than you might think.
my theory is, that my siblings and my mom don’t want to get diagnosed, because then they had to accept that they are defective; the are living the delusion that all their countless adhd problems are somebodies elses fault.
they can never break out of that thinking.