There’s one person who I came across on Tiktok who was faking. I don’t know why she was faking or how much she was faking but she would use a green screen, she used her children as actors (one day her son has a bandaged up arm, the next day her daughter does, the next day her daughter has her head bandaged up etc.) and with the same sound effects being used. Some videos she reused the same sound effect of a bomb being dropped nearby and her children would act like they were scared and cling to her but it was a bad highschool play level of acting.

Was she just doing what she needed to survive and get her family to safety? Was she living somewhere like Syria and taking advantage of the wartorn setting to exaggerate her situation?

I don’t know. I don’t think I ever will. I decided to leave it be because I don’t want to start a witchhunt. If she really is doing whatever it takes to keep her family alive and to get them to safety, can I blame her for that? Would I do anything different if i were in her shoes or would I sit patiently in silence as the bombs rain down on my head and as I watch my children starving, comfortable in the knowledge that we will all die while my moral purity remains safe?

It’s a situation where the conditions do not permit honour to flourish and so people are going to be dishonourable. I can’t fault someone for being a product of their material conditions and at the same time claim to be a materialist without becoming the most reprehensible hypocrite. And in a worst case scenario, if I spoke up about this publicly and identified the person - what effect does it have? Do people feel scorned because they were duped? Do they stop donating to Gazans completely? Do people start falsely accusing others who “seem” like they are faking it and are unworthy?

Of course there are people who would exploit any opportunity to attack Arabs and especially Palestinians to paint them as unworthy and disreputable because that’s exactly what they want the world to believe so that the genocide can continue, unbothered by negative public opinion.

I’m not about to hand my enemies ammunition like that, even if it means staying quiet and tolerating someone who is sketchy. There is no comparison between her and someone who is utterly monstrous such as Netanyahu; I’ll save my scorn for Israel because at least I know that is always a worthy target.

I swear to you that when Gofund Mai started, I felt that something detracted from my dignity.

That’s one way to look at it. I’m not going to tell you how you should feel.

But what I would like you to consider is what it feels like for people like me (what a ridiculous thing to say, right?) I can’t stop this genocide. I sit by and watch as my government supports the Israeli government’s every action. I sit by and watch as Israel continues to inflict the most brutal of injustices every day. I feel hopeless and demoralised by this, but moreover I feel completely powerless. There is no room for dignity for me under these conditions.

By making a GoFundMe you provide people like me with a meaningful way to do something about this situation, no matter how miniscule and insufficient it is. You provide me with an opportunity to reclaim some dignity in the face of constant and overwhelming indignation.

You have every right to feel how you need to about the GoFundMe but I want you to know that by asking for help you have given people the chance to reclaim some measure of their humanity by allowing them the opportunity to do something in a situation where they too feel helpless.

Why am I telling you all of this?

Because I want you to know that you aren’t responsible for the woman I described above. At the very least, she is engaging in some degree of dishonesty. If she is diverting money away from Palestinians who genuinely need financial support then I’m bitterly disappointed in her for that. But I’ll never know the truth for her situation. And yeah, there’s probably some miniscule percentage of Palestinians who have escaped this horrific situation and they have enough money from donations to buy themselves a nice gaming PC or a big TV. Would I prefer that the money going to the people who are still trapped under the boot of Israel?

Of course.

But do I really think that a Palestinian who has managed to escape and maybe afford some small degree of luxury should live in penury? Does a big TV or a new iPhone even begin to replace what they have lost and all of the things they have been deprived of?

Absolutely not.

If I had it my way, Palestinians would be free and each of them would enjoy these small luxuries because I can’t take away the deprivation and the immense suffering they have lived through but if it’s possible to make the next part of their lives better then I would support this wholeheartedly. I just wish I was rich enough to make that the reality.

Your people deserve far more than I will ever be able to give, but I give what I can. And I give with the hopes that it will afford your people the opportunity to salvage some measure of dignity, so you are able to have some amount of privacy, some of the barest basic comforts, so you might be able to make wudu instead of tayammum, so you don’t have to bear the worst of indignities of seeing your loved ones starve to death. With the hopes that it will afford you this.

I can’t ask for anything from a Palestinian living under these circumstances but the last thing I want is for donations from people like myself to cause more suffering than you are already enduring. I donate without any expectation, only hope. May these donations find some way to help you reclaim your dignity in the same way that they have helped me to reclaim some degree of humanity. May you and your people live under conditions that allow for your dignity to become whole again.

Stay safe, brother. We are with you.