Each of these reads like an extremely horny and angry man yelling their basest desires at Pornhub’s search function.

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8 points

Better wait for the 9001, you don’t want to be a first adopter on this sort of thing.

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6 points

Instructions unclear, dick stuck in toaster.

Send help.

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7 points

“We’re sorry to announce a product recall due to a low to moderate chance of your device performing an unexpected castration.”

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2 points

Just flip the switch

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