To my knowledge there’s no stagnant water on my property, I’ve run water through all my ptraps, and I’m careful to not leave doors open. Yet at any given time there’s at least 3 in my house. I can’t sleep, i can’t sit on the couch, i can’t exist in the fear of being sucked dry.

The breaking point is when i watched my dog get bit on her head. I’m ready to do whatever it takes and then some. I will kill a man if it saves me from these demons. Any ideas?

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4 points

I would also include a clause that says I never have to see it ever. It can basically be a roommate that lives in the basement and has their own entrance in the garage.

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5 points

Not sure if this is good or bad news for our great (10^6) grandchildren. On the one hand, maybe they’ll see less spiders. On the other hand, urban-camo spiders sounds horrifying.

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2 points

I woke up the other night gagging in my sleep. I swallowed spastically, compulsively over and over - something was in there. I coughed and wheezed and choked for what felt like hours before it was gone. But a lump lingered until I finally fell asleep again. I chose to believe it was a common house fly, but it went down large and hard.

The moral is, its not about seeing the spiders, its about having stupid, instinct-only vermin that will crawl into any dark, moist space it finds. Their instinct doesn’t even allow for a concept of what a human is. They only know how to eat and screw and maybe be afraid.

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