Roasted is the way to go. Toss in a generous amount of olive oil, salt, roast on a sheet pan at 425F for 15m, turn them roast an additional 5-10 minutes dictated by size and desired doneness.
That sounds horrific. Saving this to try. (I do hope you were being sarcastic, but I figure if my arteries clog, that will be a better way to go)
Edit: The batter, were you thinking like a Monte Cristo type batter? (If you gave never had one it is essentially pancake batter)
While I don’t believe there is any way to cook broccoli that will make it taste good, I think this approach has the best chance. The problem, however, is that the oil and salt rather defeat the health benefits of eating the vegetables in the first place…
I have great news for you, olive oil makes it so that your body more readily accepts cancer-fighting nutrients from vegetables.
One of the beneficial effects of olive oil is that it improves the bioavailability of lipophilic compounds such as carotenoids by acting as a food excipient, and enhances nutrient extraction and bioaccessibility
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6514867/
I don’t know how much oil you were imagining but I recommend 1tsp to 1tbsp to coat your pan.
And salt is not inherently bad for you, in fact you need it in your diet for good cardiovascular health:
…the risk of adverse health outcomes increases when sodium intakes exceeds 5 g/day or is below 3 g/day.
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8468043/
