I made a blog post discussing my biggest issues with Lemmy and why I am kind of done with it as a software.

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59 points
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👏👏👏👏👏

Well said. I don’t disagree with a single point you made, and some of it echos concerns I’ve had since day 1. And extra points for calling out .ml as lemmygrad-lite. I think I’ve called it exactly that as well.

The only thing I really have to add is on the topic of toxicity. Like you, I’m an instance admin and have a bird’s eye view of a lot of behavior patterns. I’ve recently started wondering how many people are here because they’re too toxic for regular social media rather than because they want to be here. I won’t guess an actual number, but I would say it’s not insignificant.

I’m firmly the latter case: I want to be here, I want this to succeed, and I’m trying to put in the work toward that result. And I’ve interacted with lots and lots of people in the same boat. But, like you, I’m also growing disillusioned for many of the same reasons.

On the bright side, I’ve gotten much less rusty as a developer after having to write scrips and tools to fill in the massive gaps in moderation features.

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24 points

The only thing I really have to add is on the topic of toxicity. Like you, I’m an instance admin and have a bird’s eye view of a lot of behavior patterns. I’ve recently started wondering how many people are here because they’re too toxic for regular social media rather than because they want to be here. I won’t guess an actual number, but I would say it’s not insignificant.

That’s unfortunately a big issue with alternative social media platforms and without tools to combat them it goes bad really bad. I agree completely.

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29 points

Honestly coming here and starting my own instance and providing help for other instances and stuff has reignited my long lost love of computers and open source stuff. The passion for it is thankfully coming back.

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11 points

That was me with developing. I used to do it as my day job before moving to infrastructure - now all I develop at work are scripts and the occasional lookup tool.

I do kinda wish I’d chosen something other than NodeJS to be my daily driver, lol, but it does what I need well enough. Haven’t really had a base it can’t cover (yet?).

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15 points

I once wondered aloud here about if anybody else had noticed a lot of toxic members from certain communities, only to receive replies from members in those communities claiming that it was all fine and there wasn’t any toxicity. Then I’d look at their history and notice they were a very toxic person. From my limited point of view I can say there might be some credence to your statement.

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13 points
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I’ve recently started wondering how many people are here because they’re too toxic for regular social media rather than because they want to be here.

Dude yes, I’ve been thinking the same thing. I worry that users curious to leave reddit are going to go to a big instance, see concentrated worst-parts-of-reddit, and decide it’s not for them.

In theory, decentralization enables freedom from the average user being forced to put up with toxicity. But we don’t really have that (yet) until the ratio of jerk to non-jerk improves.

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6 points

In my experience lemmy has been very wholesome compared to reddit. Even in controversial posts.

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9 points
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I’ve recently started wondering how many people are here because they’re too toxic for regular social media rather than because they want to be here.

This has largely been my operating assumption as well since day one when I came over during the Reddit API lockdown. I was fairly active on a NSFW alt up until recently and I’ve actually seen dozens of comments from new users mentioning that the only reason they were here on Lemmy was because they were banned from Reddit and had no other viable options. They were always an asshole to the posters and the reality is that with a lower population of users is that there aren’t enough other voices to drown out these people yet and you end up with a feedback loop of toxicity.

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8 points
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the reality is that with a lower population of users is that there aren’t enough other voices to drown out these people

Yep. That, plus the jerks are always the loudest among any crowd.

That’s one of the big perks of running my own instance. It’s been a site rule from the start that it’s absolutely not there to be a refuge because you’re banned elsewhere. And I do ban toxic accounts (local and federated) very quickly. Lol, if .ml is “Lemmygrad-lite” mine can probably be described as “Beehaw-lite”.

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