Look! No ads!
Take back control. Choose Plasma.
https://kde.org/plasma-desktop/
(Microsoft starts testing ads in the Windows 11 Start menu: https://www.theverge.com/2024/4/12/24128640/microsoft-windows-11-start-menu-ads-app-recommendations)
https://alternativeto.net/software/windows-xp/?platform=linux
I assume there’s a decent chance that there are some Linux users that would feel similarly since there are 25 distros that are similar to XP
Edit: re: your username, if you haven’t read Robert Aspirin’s Myth series, starting with Another fine Myth, you really should do yourself a favor and read them. They’re spoof fantasy. Funny and magical.