And I’d save scum in real life too, if I could!
A few tips, one of my favorite games but it is daunting.
Early enemies that you can’t beat like the horse rider mini boss are meant to be skipped initially and returned to later. There are a lot of immediately accessible areas which are pretty tough, but there’s also beginner dungeons. You kind of have to poke around and find them.
Co op makes this game way, way easier. Use the furled finger to place a sign down and be summoned as a helper. This is a great consequence free way to learn. If you die you keep all your runes and can upgrade and purchase stuff, and you can figure out where enemies hide, traps are, or what moves enemies use. Sometimes other players will show you useful tactics, and having someone distract enemies while the other person attacks from behind trivializes a lot of fights. Finally, helping someone beat a boss rewards you with a chunk of runes, and a finger remedy.
You can use a finger remedy to summon help to your world. This can have the consequence of allowing invaders, but you can summon two helpers at a time usually, resulting in a 3 on 1 fight for invaders. If you get lucky your helper will destroy bosses for you so keep an eye out for summoning signs at boss doors. Often times those people are well prepared to assist and may know the boss weakness and move sets.
If you don’t want player help but still want an assist you can use “summoning ashes” with a summoning bell. You can get this at the church where one of the first merchants is - go there at night after you’ve acquired your horse. As you play further you’ll find more powerful summons to help you, some with special abilities, some more useful than others. It requires mana to use these and will replace player helpers (only one at a time), but you won’t get invaded, can resummon them if you have mana, and they are useful as a distraction to enemies.
There’s a lot to discover, and bypassing harder parts to backtrack later is highly recommended. Beginner dungeons usually reward you with summoning ashes after defeating their bosses. Knowledge is power in Elden Ring, don’t be afraid to die to gain that knowledge.
It’s still a tough fucking game though, so I don’t blame you if it’s still not your thing. If any of that seems helpful though maybe give it another try!