Finished with university until September now, and have most of my grades for this year back (still waiting on one module). Having mixed feelings about the grades, because I know objectively that theyāre excellent, yet I still feel like I could have done better. I still got better grades than everyone else. I will acknowledge the two may be connected: when you constantly feel like you could be doing better, you push yourself harder. Even so, I did learn a ridiculous amount this year, and produced some work Iām really proud of.
The end outcome of this is, of course, that Iām exhausted, yet simultaneously having trouble slowing down. Having been pushing at full speed ahead for many months, Iām now feeling weirded out by not having any assignments to do or deadlines to meet. If I had to summarise what my brain is doing right now, it would be:
???
There is also tangible relief to be away fromā¦ that guy. I canāt remember if I posted about it at the time but basically he got caught lying about his part of the group project, namely that he had finished it when he had not even started it. So with 24 hours before the deadline, we essentially kicked him off the team and I did his section of the project. A weekās worth of work packed into a single evening. Because heās using his neurodiversity as an excuse for not doing anything for half the year, theyāre probably going to be reluctant to kick him outā¦ but thatās a problem for next September. For now, Iām just going to enjoy not having to deal with the useless, arrogant prick for a few months.
Yeah I remember you writing his part of the projectā¦ fair warning, work life is generally full of these assholes and consider this some valuable training. Do not let them slide, make sure youāre representing your efforts (fairly, but firmly) keep your name out front, these shitheads will not hesitate to sling mud at you and your work to save themselves.
For sure, itās definitely been valuable experience! I would like to think in a working environment, things would be a bitā¦ easier, I guess, since a big part of the problem was this project didnāt have any effective leadership that could challenge the asshole on his lack of contributions. Whereas I would hope that in an actual studio, department heads wouldnāt let someone produce absolutely no work for months, while blindly believing every excuse which is, sadly, what the leader for this project did. The lecturer knew what was up, because despite taking a hands-off approach, he was watching far more closely than most of the class realised - but he let it play out this way precisely because itās a good learning experience. Suffice to say, I got an extra few points on my grade because I stepped in at the last minute.
Iām glad they were tracking the efforts of the students behind the scenes, and extra happy that your own efforts were seen and rewarded.
I want to reassure you about your future workplaces, but Iāve definitely had some supervisors/managers who were incredibly complacent about staff issues. One thing Iād add to @Che_Bananaās great advice is to reflect on your responses to those challenges - what did you do that helped to destress you and keep you on track, and what did you do that didnāt? Practicing the helpful ones with less stressful events to ingrain them and improve on them will serve you really well.
And always feel free to vent to us!
