That is hilarious but too much effort. A simple ‘Fuck off’ should suffice.
That does work too, but not on the ones that put shit on you and demand payment, usually operating as 2+. Their tactic is intimidation and drama—playing the victim to you—but it can not be beaten if you’re playing the role of a happy idiot, providing random or exact opposite behaviour to what they’re attempting.
One of these guys walked up and gave me a handful of birdseed, prompting a flock of pigeons to come perch on my arms. I most certainly did not hand over the money they wanted for the experience I didn’t ask for and was somewhat disgusted by.