Written by: Russell T Davies

Directed by: Mark Tonderai

2 points

I felt like I was talking to myself last week, and I don’t actually have to be online to do that, so rather than type out my full thoughts on this one, I’ll aim for controversy.

The Goblin Song: yea or nay?

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3 points

Absolute yea!

Although I wasn’t a fan of how the goblins kept acting like they were going to eat the baby, ready with knives and forks, but no, really it was the king the only one who was going to try it.

My brain can usually get around the sci-fi-magic in doctor who but that sort of argumental u-turn gets me scratching my head for too long, even if it’s a small detail.

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2 points

Best not to think about how many babies that big fella needs to fill his belly per day — plus according to the song lyrics, the little goblins do also eat but I guess royalty gets the first bite?

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2 points

I love/hate it when I get bumped by stupid stuff like that.

I’m also a “yea” - the one thing that bumped me was Ruby joining in so readily. My first assumption was that it was the magic at work, but then I remembered that they sort of introduced her musical talent during the pub scene. I don’t think we saw quite enough to ascertain how talented she was, though.

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2 points

I liked this one a lot, even if it had its issues. Sure, it was a big step toward fantasy — but I think the expanded definition of “technology” made it work in a Who setting. The goblin song was fun, but RTD shouldn’t quit his day job to write more song lyrics (ugh, I feel a “Twist at the end” coming up).

Ncuti Gatwa is amazing as the Doctor, simply a natural ball of charm and sass. Millie Gibson is great, too and I think Ruby had a passable introduction here by way of her “three queens up in the sky” family. I totally fell for the generational dynamic with Ruby, Cherry and Carla, and wanted to get to know them better. The following season was a bit of a letdown in that department.

For a soft reboot/entry level for new viewers I think “Church on Ruby Road” was successful. It dropped hints to the Doctor’s history while also paving the way for new subjects and genre mashups. The “genre flip” into fantasy really isn’t as dramatic as RTD announced it to be; Doctor Who was always balancing all speculative genres. I just hope there is a good payoff to the Mrs Flood setup.

I do wish we had had a few more minutes to the episode so the tenderer character moments could land. It all felt a bit frantic, rushing from beat to beat. That too became a bit of a recurring issue as season 1 aired, but let that lie for another retrospective…

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2 points

For some reason, I’ve been mentally giving all the credit/blame to Murray Gold, but of course RTD would have done the lyrics.

There is one bit that lives rent-free in my head - it works surprisingly well as long as you remember that poor Ruby is improvising:

It’s good to meet you

Good to greet you

Good to say

How diddly-deet you

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2 points

They’re fun lyrics, it’s a novelty song! The whole “Baby we eat, eat with our teeth” piece is hilarious, and like you say, the Doctor and Ruby joining in was unexpectedly well done. I enjoyed that the main singer, apparently, is called “Janis Goblin”. So deliciously dumb 😄

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