153 points

It helps if your two choices for president aren’t Father Time and the Orange Rage Demon.

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50 points

Father Time and the Orange Rage Demon sounds like a great B-movie, though 😄

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8 points

Start casting. Troma films will have a script by this afternoon.

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9 points

panics and casts his cats in the lead roles

Emily and Charlotte weren’t thrilled either…

I’m pretty happy with my casting for the rest of the Republican party, though:

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1 point

Correction:Full Moon, not Troma!

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4 points

Or some bosses in Dark Souls.

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19 points

You dropped your p

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8 points

My father eloquently described it as a battle between “a zombie who doesn’t know what room he’s in and the reincarnation of Zhirinovsky”.

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123 points

Don’t believe the hype, FUCKING VOTE!!! Volunteer to give rides for those that can’t make it to vote otherwise.

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37 points
*

Believe this hype; You can make a difference.

I lived in Florida in 2000. If I had recruited a couple friends, and I knew people who would have been down, and we drove vans back and forth to the polls all day…

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7 points

512 votes would have made a difference.

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4 points

Awesome job!

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1 point

What I mean by don’t believe the hype is people tend to not vote when they think they’re going to win in a landslide. Which of course, they would IF they vote. We ended up with Dementia Don the racist rapist with 34 felonies that can’t complete a coherent sentence because Hillary was kicking his ass in the polls so voter turnout was lower.

Regardless, VOTE

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19 points

On a side note: Just the fucking fact that people would need a ride to vote also shows that

a) Voting is too damn hard in the US. I know that the Republican party has been working (and keeps working) hard on making voting nearly impossible, because less votes is better for them, but seriously: make voting easier.

b) The US is extremely over dependent on cars. In the Netherlands almost nobody would drive their car to go vote, you use a bike. Why? Because the cities in the country are designed for people first, not for cars first. Start modifying your cities to not require cars. Add bicycle roads, actually invest in public transportation, add pedestrian walk ways. The US sucks for human beings, it’s awesome for cars.

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14 points
*

Voting is too damn hard in the US.

It’s too damn hard in certain states.

I’m in California, and am signed up for vote by mail, which anyone can do. Ballot gets mailed to me well in advance, I can take my time filling it out and researching down ballot issues, and plop it in a mailbox when I’m done.

It’s criminal to me that this isn’t the norm.

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3 points

I live in Colorado, and I feel the same way about this. I love the way voting works here. This should be the norm. It should be REQUIRED at the federal level that this is an offering in every state in the land.

Any state that is not doing this does not care at all about the democratic process, IMHO, given there are outstanding examples of states that do.

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2 points

Voting is bullshit here, thanks to the republikkklowns. I’m hoping when the VP becomes president, we can remedy some of that.

Your point on the cars. Your example country is 237 times smaller than ours. .42%. We have 342 million people compared to their almost 19 million. What works there won’t work here. It would be great to step up public transportation but that’s not the end all answer.

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1 point

Nonsense. India’s population is far greater than the US, and they can do better elections than the US. Saying that you can’t do bicycle roads in the US because what works in the Netherlands doesn’t work in bigger countries is, again, nonsense. Mexico is adding bicycle roads. Canada is. Why can’t the US?

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13 points

This is what I did for the 2018 midterms. Some of my friends didn’t really get why I was so adamant, but I dropped their assess at the church and let them vote. It do work.

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1 point

Yes, I was like “Oh, thank christ” when i saw this headline, but also fear this is right propaganda to relax voters. VOTE!

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77 points

make it a landslide

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52 points

That’s the only way that democracy is not in imminent danger.

If fascism is only beaten by the same tight margin that more sane and humane (but still neurotic and cruel) conservatism was for the second presidential election in a row, that means that the second largest party in the richest and most powerful country in the world being a fascist party has become the norm rather than just an unusually persistent aberration.

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8 points

Man I hope so. I remember thinking the Republican party was dead and would have to move towards the center back in 2008 when Obama was elected and had a super majority in the Senate. But rather than pivot, the GOP dug their heels in, obstructed as much as possible, and went even further to the right.

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3 points
*

It became the norm in Vietnam and was confirmed under Reagan. The rest was just waiting for the WW2 survivors who remembered the dogwhistles to die.

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0 points
*

This is a problem, but another problem is that today’s politicians have learned to do fascist stuff without a fascist party. Accountability and transparency.

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53 points

I hope she picks a good VP and not wet blanket like democratic establishment would want.

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44 points

It appears she’s looking at people who could swing a purple state, so that probably won’t excite anyone hoping for a progressive ticket.

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53 points

Almost as if you need to win before you can do anything at all.

Like it or not, the reality of the electoral college.

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10 points

You can win in multiple different ways, not simply picking a purple state moderate. The whole reason there’s a story about “more youth voters like Harris” is because more youth voters could help her win. And the youths notably live in every swing state.

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4 points

It’s so frustrating people don’t get this. Progressive politics is stringing together election victories. The US system is designed to require longer term horizons to enact significant change. And we saw precisely why when we survived Trump’s term.

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13 points

Tim waltz seems like a good pick. Seems to have a bit of the Bernie, no-bullshit, authenticity that plays well with independents.

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29 points

My preference is as follows:

  1. Mark Kelly - Pros: Astronaut/Navy Combat Pilot; will pull veterans and people voting for novelty. He generally has moderate policies and won a national race in a battleground state. His Senate seat is safe because Gov. Hobbs (D) can appoint another Dem to fill it.

  2. Pete Buttigieg - Also a veteran, oxford/rhodes scholar; one of the best debaters in D.C. Coming from a Cabinet position so does not risk any loss.

  3. Whitmer - Contrary to some, I like the idea of doubling-down on women in this post-Roe, MeToo era. She brings a lot to the table, but she’s no longer in the running as she (a) both publicly and privately declined, and (b) she like Shapiro would be better off carrying their respective battleground states without either state feeling like they’ve been abandoned.

  4. Jon Stewart - He won’t do it, but hear me out: Viral excitement; strong debater; cross-over appeal to veterans & first-responders thanks to his decades of helping them. The Zelenskyy of our nation. Counter lies and half-truths with satire and mockery.

I DON’T think Harris should be pick Cooper, Beshear, Walz, or especially Newsom.

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21 points

Mark Kelly was one of the people giving standing ovations and clapping away at Bibi’s speech to Congress. That really made my stomach churn.

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11 points

I like your list. I think Mark Kelly is the obvious best choice and I hope she lands on him. Novelty factor is strong, it would be foolish to underestimate the astronaut card. He balances the ticket well and might also help win Arizona.

Jon Stewart would be absolutely hilarious, though. If nothing else than for a potential VP debate with alleged couch fornicator Vance.

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9 points

Mark Kelly looks good on paper, but his pro genocide and lukewarm stance towards unions is a wet blanket. Do people find him genuine?

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8 points

Thank you for not including Shapiro and not risking a swing state getting a Republican governor

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3 points
*

Mark Kelly is my favorite option too. If nothing else he is cool as hell and has that “great to have a beer with” quality. He’s also very white. None of these things should matter but he’s a great balancing choice for her presidency.

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1 point

This is a good list.

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8 points

Walz is a great governor. I don’t want to lose him as one, but I do think he’d be a great pick

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6 points
*

We get Peggy Flanagan as a replacement. She rocks. Bonus points for getting a native American female governor as well

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2 points

I think Tim Waltz would be a great pick. Full authenticity. A no nonsense and non flashy Midwestern white democrat from a rural district who lead a surprisingly progressive agenda. Count me in

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2 points

Timmy has been a great governor for our state.

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42 points

If you felt “meh” about doing the utmost to avoid Trump, you might just be an idiot,

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46 points

Remember, if they’re voting in their first election this year, there’s a decent chance they were under ten before Trump emerged on the scene as a politician. They don’t remember what it used to be like. They think this is normal.

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22 points

Shit, you’re absolutely right but I never thought about it that way.

Jesus, we’ve let these kids down. This is all they’ve known through their adolescence…

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8 points

There will be an entire branch of psychology opened up for kids who were born between 2006-2021. War, climate change, Trump, COVID, more war, more war? On its own, the fact that they’re not spending every waking hour in ceaseless screaming is worth writing a few papers on.

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3 points

Jesus, we’ve let these kids down.

Yes, and people call them idiots for wanting better than a Hobson’s choice between “genocide” and “more genocide.”

Just look at what happened when someone listened to them.

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12 points

Fucking yikes. That’s terrifying.

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11 points

Young people are not renowned for their wisdom.

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6 points

Their elders have done such a bang up job, eh. So much wisdom and here we all are blaming and knocking young people having to inherit all this bullshit.

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-7 points

speak for yourself

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6 points

Yeah, kids are allowed to vote (and go off to war, and get themselves into crippling debt) at 18 but their decision making doesn’t mature until after they’re 25. Maybe adulthood should start a little later.

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5 points

Something, something, rent a car. I definitely had something for this. Come back to me.

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0 points

Neither are boomers, but we’ve spent the past 4 decades doing every last thing those shitheels want.

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-6 points

not really.

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4 points

Yes, but. Let’s not circle the firing squad.

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-4 points

Not before they have voted.

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3 points

Voting is not your utmost. It’s the bare minimum.

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-4 points
*

To whoever downvoted this: You won’t make it in life.

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0 points

Biden wasn’t the utmost to avoid Trump.

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