Like - what do I write in the card? What the hell do I get them? They come up so quickly as well.
Yes. I hate birthdays, mine and others’. I hate receiving gifts and I hate being in the spotlight, and having to act differently towards others for one particular day of the year for no reason trips me up. If I appreciate another person I will show it consistently, not just on one token day of the year. The whole thing feels awkward and makes me act awkward.
I may have seen something my girlfriend would have liked in a shop and bought it, then kept it over for a bit planning on giving it to her on her birthday. But then one time she was around and I wanted to give her something to show my love to her, so I just went and gave it to her early. Now I have to find something else. Oops.
Cards:
- write what you like about them
- add a relevant story you guys share within the last year that reflects that quality of theirs
Gifts:
- if they tell you they like something throughout the year, add it to a private note to look at during their bday
- something they would love to have or use but wouldn’t spend their own money
- bonus: relevant to their quality story
Example
Card: Happy birthday! I love how you’re always happy, like when we went to the beach and it started raining. Even though we were bummed out, you found a way to make it fun and we had a great time. I hope you receive the same happiness on your birthday that you gave me at the beach.
Gift: The shirt they said they liked at the beach store but didn’t buy it for themselves.
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edit: Warning, some people will become upset if they recognize that you follow this/a formula. I haven’t figured out a solution to this.
You’re welcome! I’d be happy to help you out with your particular situation. Hit me up on matrix if you’d like 🙂👍
Also,
edit: Warning, some people will become upset if they recognize that you follow this/a formula. I haven’t figured out a solution to this.
To be fair I use the same card design every year, so it probably wouldn’t be much worse
But of course its you! :)) thanks for sharing this. I struggle with this as well. Great advice.
Thanks! Imagine the possibilities if we could decode the patterns of NT social interaction. Formulas, flowcharts, and nodes everywhere 🙆. Birthday coming up? “Activate Birthday Gifts and Card Protocol, go!” 😄
Like - what do I write in the card?
“Congratulations on surviving another circuit around the sun.”
What the hell do I get them?
I usually rely on them giving me a list.
Yes and I literally forgot my own birthday once.