In 2019 a friend and I got subscriptions to Regal and began going to a movie a week. Most days we’d plan something, but sometimes we’d just show up and pick something. (We blindly picked Underwater, and what a great surprise. Also decided to see the Tom Hanks Mr. Rogers film and proceed to ugly cry all over myself.)
Then COVID.
The last movie I saw in theaters as a subscriber was Bad Boys for Life. I tried to go see Dune 1. I drove 30m, bought popcorn and a slushee, and waited… But the video file was corrupted. They said they had to redownload it before the next show, so they canceled the showing and gave everyone a free ticket. I never bothered using it. I just went home and watched it for free on HBO Max.
I love theaters, both as nostalgia and just to have a huge screen. But man, “paying extra to go out of your way” is a difficult sell.
Why would I pay >$30 for a subpar watching experience where there’s annoying people all around, I can’t stretch my legs, I can’t bring in my own food, and I’m shoved an industry ad that blames me for seeking a better market option (the seven seas stores tend to have the same movies for less than 1/30th of the price)?
We’re in an age of huge screens and sound systems at home.
Plus it seems we’re also in an age of paying a months worth of streaming service for one person to see one movie.
It’s no wonder the cinema is on its arse.
Tbf i thought wicked was pretty great-
The moviegoing experience is too expensive. $20+ tickets and a bag of popcorn priced like a steak dinner? Movies used to be a date night activity, it’s too damn expensive for that now. What teenager can even afford to take a girl to the movies?
And the films are crap. I watched Hollywood die, bloat and start to outgas. They don’t make comedies anymore. There’s maybe the Meet The Spartans guys who frat bro no homo joke their way through “parodies”. Everything else is churned out corporate sludge with way too much CGI.
B movies just don’t get made anymore. The upper end of B movies, like all those junk food action movies Cannon used to make, are now premium cable/streaming service TV shows. In the 80’s if you wanted to see cheap crap action schlock you’d go to the theater or rental store and see “Chuck Norris Is: Eagle Death Kick”, now you turn on Longmire and watch Grizzled McViagra shoot an injun right in the rezz. All of the really low budget independent “someone found a camera” stuff that RedLetterMedia laughs at three at a time end up on Youtube now, like Viva La Dirt League and their gaming-centric skits. During the Flash era and into the early days of Youtube there were a lot of budding animators but Youtube decided to kill that. So B movies are gone.
Hallmark has replaced the rom com, as far as I can tell. Everyone’s mom is currently busy lapping up “Woman living busy life moves to a small town and falls for an architect over the Christmas holiday CLXXIV” They churn out a few dozen of them every year. They don’t make While You Were Sleeping or My Big Fat Greek Wedding anymore, the rom com has gone the way of “finger family pregnant frozen elsa kills hitler spiderman,” optimized for maximum eyeball on screen time, except instead of toddlers it’s middle aged women.
What’s left but the five official franchises they’re allowed to make media about anymore? Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, Marvel, DC and Star Trek. And that last one has made the jump back to TV. Quippy dialog filmed like a big sound board so they can make the whole movie in post. It’s amazing how long it’s worked.
