39 points

Instructions unclear. I think I may have just fucked a coffee maker.

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39 points

I believe the proper term is Barista

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5 points

Could just be someone named Mr coffee

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7 points

Remedy is the same: report to the burn ward.

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3 points
Deleted by creator
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33 points
*

To be fair, coffee machines are pretty shit.

I had a cheap one from Target that I had on a smart switch die after about a year and a half.

Then I got a super clunky Mr. Coffee one (seriously I’ve owned a lot of “nice” ones but I bought it online and it was a huge pile of curves and brought me back to the 90’s).

My wife then wanted a $200 Keurig because they’re “so fancy” but she never used it, and it died during its cleaning cycle because apparently if you keep adding (too much) water it doesn’t stop you and overheats. I got a warranty replacement but then that one had super glitchy buttons that didn’t work and I got tired of fucking over the planet one Kroger K-Cup at a time.

Finally I ditched all that shit and got a pour-over coffee set and a grinder, and a really nice electric kettle with temperature control.

At some point the tech is simply too much and it’s the simplest option that’s best.

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6 points
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Oh, I assure you they could design and build good shit if they wanted. Most things are designed like shit and then built to a price point.

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3 points

They do design and build good shit, but with the prevalence of cheap options buying small kitchen appliances isn’t seen as a major purchase anymore.

But, there were absolutely garbage products in the old days. The whole, “they don’t build them like they used to,” bit is based on survivorship bias.

If you want to pay $500+ for a coffee maker that will last decades, you can absolutely still do so.

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1 point

A cheapass drip coffee maker makes a decent coffee, is mechanically simple as fuck and easy to clean, I got one for like 30 euros and if I don’t use it for months I just don’t care.

We have a coffee machine at work for the lattes amd espressos or go out and drink one there if you want. Having an expensive coffee machine at home is a waste unless you are a serious caffeine addict, which to be fair, I would be if not for all the anxiety it causes me.

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-2 points

Drag’s dragon is a big time coffee addict and still insists on boiling water in the microwave like a ridiculous American.

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1 point

Yeah definitely, plus people give drip coffee a bad name because it’s not “posh” enough, as if it isn’t one of the best balances of coffee qualities you can achieve. It’s not like espresso coffee was invented because it’s “better”, it’s just very quick + semi-automated to produce a shot and hence economical for coffee shops and bakeries.

Plus drip coffee systems are, like you say, insanely simple. Which is a good thing!

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6 points

I have a moka machine that was hand made by my SO great grandfather (railroad welder) and it will outlive us all. Even a cheap one (10 £) can last forever, just replace the filter and fitting every few years at most.

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1 point

Meanwhile im pouring instant barley coffe in the cup and be done with it.

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1 point
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Are K-Cups bad for the planet?

A pour over wouldn’t work for things like a Latte. I don’t really believe in all the fancy pods and stuff though, I have a manual espresso pump machine.

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7 points

Are K-Cups bad for the planet?

TL;DR: they don’t recycle all that well, if at all.

https://action.storyofstuff.org/sign/amount-k-cups-have-been-thrown-landfills-could-wrap-around-planet-over-11-times

For me, I find the coffee selection for these things kind of bad and limited. There’s simply so much more out there and I profoundly dislike the idea of letting some corporation decide what will and will not brew in my kitchen. I suppose the re-usable k-cups are a good compromise though - I don’t know if Keurig’s have any kind of detection or lockout that prevents their use.

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2 points

After a long coffee journey, i gave my keurig away for free after i landed on my chemex. Absolutely love it! Unfortunately my 12 cup broke in the washing machine after 8 years or so :( i just bought a new one and I’m unsurprisingly still very happy with it.

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79 points
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It is a hilarious joke, but please don’t rationalize replacing stuff when it is still working. Buy quality goods and maintain them properly, repair when needed.

A good coffee machine should last at least decades ❤️.

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11 points
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A good coffee machine should last at least decades ❤️.

Again, depending on usage. How about you give it as a more useful metric. Servings and sit-time. Those determine how long your machine lasts.

And well if we’re talking a simple drip-coffee machine, they’re 10€, you’re not going to maintain or repair them no matter how much someone else might think you ought to, you’ll just get a new one. A 2000€-5000€ automated two-bean-tank coffee maker is a wholly different thing, of course.

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13 points

I would at least try to maintain it, just for fun. Put some music on and crack it open.

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3 points

Oh yeah that’s kinda my vibe, too. I’d just want to know how it looks inside, anyways.

I will say from experience that if anybody here owns a Melitta Smart TS, as amazing as that machine is for the 620€ I paid for it considering it keeps up with the 2k Siemens machine, you do need to unscrew the metal plate behind the brewing unit and hold your gag reflex if you never did that before, they made a mistake with the large opening above it and ground coffee can fall in and will slowly get moist and rot in there. Luckily nowhere near the brewing actually, but such a weird blunder to do with an otherwise well-designed machine. I was wondering where that smell came from…

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1 point

Well, automats only if they’re really good.

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6 points

I expect my v-60 to last the rest of my life, or at least until I drop it on something hard enough to break it.

No machine needed to go from no coffee to coffee and cleaned up ik 5 minutes.

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3 points

My electric keg broke after about 7 years 🥹 Trying to decide between buying a reliable one or a second hand one. Or both?

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2 points

I know the electric kettle might be a bit faster depending on your appliance, but a decent stovetop gooseneck kettle for pour overs did wonders for my coffee game. Better coffee, won’t ever break, cheaper than all but the worst electric kettles.

Get a nice little scale and you’ll be set for life.

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4 points

A good e61 based espresso machine should last forever as every part is replaceable and readily available. Something like the gaggia classic. Granted, they aren’t 30 bucks, but they are cheaper than any expensive bean to cup machine.

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1 point
*

I’ll call it an Italian/French stove top coffee maker, but they will last 100 years. Espresso quality.

I prefer cheap filter coffeemakers for saving on coffee and energy. More expensive than above but more convenient and still cheap even if 10 year purchases not bothering to replace a broken part.

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1 point

Moka is to espresso as french press is to drip, they just not the same. Nothing wrong with them, but its a false equivalence. If you prefer moka then drink it, if you prefer espresso then drink that instead.

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1 point

Gaggia classic isn’t an e61 though, it just happens to have 58mm grouphead. Nonetheless, I would recommend a Gaggia or a rancilio Silvia over an actual e61, since those are both more expensive and more difficult to maintain (and heat up more quickly).

Honestly, real endgame is anything lever based in my opinion anyway. But that’s just my preference.

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1 point

Levers can be the ultimate for long lasting as virtually zero parts to wear out especially the ones that require you to heat up the water yourself, but I would struggle to recommend one to someone coming from a bean to cup due to the difficultly factor. My first espresso was a Flair, having to get the temp, speed, and pressure consistent every time for every shot at 6am in the morning was a complete PITA on top of getting the grind, temp, and weight right for that shot. I soon switched to an E61 as its just push button in comparison.

Long term I want a lever like the Strietman CT2 but not till I get a Decent for everyday use.

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5 points

What if I’m too poor to afford a quality coffee maker

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8 points
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Then I believe a v60 might work best for you? I think a plastic v60 cost around 9$, and they can last decently long.

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2 points
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Something like a v60 or an aeropress saves a lot of money in the short term. But you lose out in the long term by increasing your standards for coffee and basically falling down a coffee rabbit hole.

I bought an aeropress 10 years ago to save money…

Signed, someone currently in the market for a 4 figure espresso machine.

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4 points

But whatever you can afford from a second hand store.

Saves on money, prevents waste. Win/win

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Buy coffee filters and rubber bands. Put coffee in the filter, tie it up with a rubber band, and then make coffee like you make tea.

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9 points

“well blame dad for that, not my fault the hand I was dealt”

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5 points

It’s a really good hand 👋🍆💦

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18 points

There is no burn like a “where are my grandkids” burn from your mom. OP doesn’t need an ambulance, they need a hearse for a trip to the morgue.

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