It seems like if the statement is literal, then it’s self-disproving, since the person cares enough to say that, and the person who they were saying that to cared enough to say whatever they said or did prior. Also the likelihood of no one (as in, no human I guess?) caring about what they had to say seems very low, and chances are a large number of other people probably would care, too.
If the statement isn’t literal but more rhetorical, then I’m not sure what it means, but I suspect it basically just means “I don’t care” (as in the person who says “No one cares” doesn’t care themself and wants to express this in a way that seeks to hold more weight by asserting that all other people feel the same sentiment as them, even though arguably they demonstrably care somewhat if they went out of their way to say that, I guess depending on effort required, or perhaps didn’t care originally but then developed some degree of care as a result of the annoyance they felt at being exposed to something)… or maybe it just means “I don’t like what you said/did” or “I’m annoyed by you”… alternatively it could mean “I think you’re stupid/worthless”, “I disagree with you” or “I don’t want you to speak/speak about this again”, or similar.
Anyhow, what is the most appropriate way to respond to this? It seems like an emotionally charged statement that warrants, perhaps being completely ignored, or maybe a measured response seeking to find some understanding or common ground, though a witty retort could be appropriate if respectful (I don’t believe 2 wrongs make a right, unless the first wrong somewhat necessitates the second, if that makes sense). That said, I’m open to hearing any kind of replies that might be given, regardless of how cordial/civil (or not) they are.
tldr but usually the meta language of ‘no one cares’ is ‘shut up(because no one cares)’
But it really the case that no one cares? I suspect that some people might.
Nah, it’s not a literal statement. It’s a rude way to say “I don’t want to talk about this”. It can be due to a genuine lack of interest, or if you’re trying to have an emotional conversation, it’s a malicious way to downplay your experience.
It’s a big old world and there’s always at least one person who will care about something.
Going out on a limb here that you’re either young, or some flavor of “nuero-spicy” (I think that’s the hip new term people are using lately).
It’s almost always used rhetorically. To a degree that I could count the number of times I’ve heard it used otherwise in my over 30 years of life on one hand.
The way to respond to it depends on the conversation, but generally it’s your cue to change the subject, or drop the topic they were referring to. Unless you want to start an argument or make things awkward.
You’re also missing some other important “rhetorical” or at least non-literal uses:
- “You’re over thinking this”
- “So few people care about this that it isn’t worth discussing (at least right now or in this context)”
- “That isn’t relevant”
I’m sure I’m missing some other uses myself.
The only way to determine which it’s being used as is through context clues, tone, body language, facial expressions, etc. Welcome to the annoying as hell wonderful world of navigating conversations with people that don’t directly say what they mean.
It gets easier over time with experience, same as any other skill. It’s just a harder skill for some of us to build than it is for others… same as any other skill.
You’re missing a critical distinction.
People can not care about (topic), while caring a lot about (disruptive discussion of (topic)).
The two aren’t mutually exclusive.
It’s like I don’t have a particular opinion about cornflakes, but if you keep waving a box of them in people’s face and hitting them with it, then i’mma ask you to stop.
It can be annoying to have to deal with someone going into excessive detail, making inappropriately-fine distinctions, or taking a strong position on one side or other of an argument that nobody’s making - since in all of those cases, nobody is willing or able to engage with the topic, and it’s just taking up conversation-space with (effectively) a monologue that they find boring and exhausting.
If someone says ‘hey look at that funny-shaped tree’ because it looks like something else, it’s usually worth a ‘heh’ in the moment and you move on.
If you start going into great detail of whether or not it actually counts as a tree, or just infodumping neat tree facts, or start ranting about which genus it properly belongs to despite what some people think… then someone will shut you down with ‘Dude. No one cares’.
What if the tree looked exactly like your face and you failed to recognise it so I obsessively photographed it from all angles & made you gaze at the photos until you agreed with me and said “Huh. Something’s up with that”.?
Everyone appears to be hitting the “shut up, no one cares”.
There is also the “stop worrying, no one cares.” This is meant to be reassuring. It may be literal.
