Not realistic enough: cop didn’t shoot anyone/thing
I’ll be honest, every time I’ve tried roleplaying I can’t take it seriously, I just bust up laughing at the absurdity of it, which then gets my wife laughing while being annoyed at the same time, so then we have laughing frustration sex, so, win?
Wouldn’t you have sex anyway? Or is there something that makes laughing frustration sex special?
Yeah, but my point was that the original idea of fantasy sex changes into a “you suck gigglefest” type of ordeal. Troll sex, if you will.
DM;HS
idk woman. have you tried… well… talking to him instead of the interwebs?
I don’t roleplay in the bedroom. Being blessed with the dramatic talent of a water heater makes it a rather daunting task.
But…
Envy those who can. Those have extra fun when having fun.
This couple?
I risk the dude is trying to add an extra layer of personal fun. But definitely falling short of the objective.
I think the dude is nailing it. Especially the OFFICER DOWN part is sweet.
bloodninja: Baby, I been havin a tough night so treat me nice aight?
BritneySpears14: Aight.
bloodninja: Slip out of those pants baby, yeah.
BritneySpears14: I slip out of my pants, just for you, bloodninja.
bloodninja: Oh yeah, aight. Aight, I put on my robe and wizard hat.
BritneySpears14: Oh, I like to play dress up.
bloodninja: Me too baby.
BritneySpears14: I kiss you softly on your chest.
bloodninja: I cast Lvl. 3 Eroticism. You turn into a real beautiful woman.
BritneySpears14: Hey…
bloodninja: I meditate to regain my mana, before casting Lvl. 8 Cock of the Infinite.
BritneySpears14: Funny I still don’t see it.
bloodninja: I spend my mana reserves to cast Mighty F*ck of the Beyondness.
BritneySpears14: You are the worst cyber partner ever. This is ridiculous.
bloodninja: Don’t f*ck with me bitch, I’m the mightiest sorcerer of the lands.
bloodninja: I steal yo soul and cast Lightning Lvl. 1,000,000 Your body explodes into a fine bloody mist, because you are only a Lvl. 2 Druid.
BritneySpears14: Don’t ever message me again you piece of ****.
bloodninja: Robots are trying to drill my brain but my lightning shield inflicts DOA attack, leaving the robots as flaming piles of metal.
bloodninja: King Arthur congratulates me for destroying Dr. Robotnik’s evil army of Robot Socialist Republics. The cold war ends. Reagan steals my accomplishments and makes like it was cause of him.
bloodninja: You still there baby? I think it’s getting hard now.
bloodninja: Baby?
https://codeberg.org/257m/qdbscrap/ is the web scraper and here is the link to source: https://codeberg.org/257m/qdbscrap/src/branch/main/fortunes. If you want it precompiled: https://codeberg.org/257m/qdbscrap/src/branch/main/fortunes.dat