9 points

thank you for creating snacks

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10 points

I love the smell of warm content in the morning!

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7 points

CONTENT

The word crackles and distorts through the grills of the haphazardly placed ceiling speakers. In unison the uniformed workers leave their assigned positions in a mechanical fashion. Neatly aligning in tight columns, the pathetic parade progressed into the cafeteria.

CONTENT

Deafening decibles departed the loudspeakers lining the large room. The same cryptic voice invaded every crevice of the worker’s ears. Again in unison, they each removed a small, rectangular device from the right pocket of their uniform. Bright wavelengths of blue sliced through empty corneas to disrupt waves of a different type.

CONSUME

The voice permeated the entirety of the room once more.

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5 points

precedent established: commentary content is content!

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5 points

Oh, you fucks. You know nights don’t clock in until 7:01 on the dot. What are we gonna get, another pizza party?

Well, you can tell Mama Mia to take that sauce and shove it back up her ass, we work all night, we deserve some goddamn content. Even if it’s the leftovers, it’s better than what we’ve been getting!

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4 points

Thank you for creating content!

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