I never had a social life, either romantic or Platonic, and I’m wondering if anyone else has gone from 0 social life to an active one past college. Like I wasted college just going to classes and I graduated already. Thoughts?
It’s never too late.
no, if you had the ability to create one and chose not to.
also no, if you didn’t have the ability, realize that and start working at the reasons why. (in my case it turned out to be autism).
Of course it’s not too late, it only appears harder because in school we spent a lot of time during the week with many people the same age. But only a fraction of that time is needed, all it takes is being around people and talking to people.
Many on lemmy rightly complain of the lack of “third spaces” nowadays in many of the richer countries (you said college I’m guessing US or UK?), so for example in many places it’d be a bit weird to just go to the pub alone. But you can also just go alone and do and enjoy whatever you want, it just takes a bit more confidence, the embarassment of it usually wears off with age for most.
What’s probably easier is joining some semi-regular activity where you get to chat. So pub quiz night, language exchange, chess club, hiking group, etc… are more likely to aid you in this compared to loud night clubs, the gym, or whatever, it’s all subjective it’s still important to do the stuff you enjoy, regardless of socializing.
I’ve had close to 0 social life in high school and the first year of college.
What turned me around was joining a board game club.
What I’ve learned from this experience is that everyone
has a minimum and maximum amount of time and slots for friendships
and newcomers are the ones most likely with empty friendships slots.
Find a hobby you like and look for local groups of people / classes in that hobby. With time you will make personal connections with people in that group.
Could be workouts, activism, trekking, board games, knitting, book club, debates. Anything that does not involve staring at a screen.
