dont be a tryhard nerd heres how to be like lightning

  • borrow money from your friends and family until they stop talking to you
  • lie to doctors
  • use a waterpick instead of flossing
  • dont wash your hands unless someones watching
  • dont get car maintenance and just crash it when you need a new one
  • say uh huh every so often when your wife is talking instead of listening

do you know more tips and tricks to be like lightning if so please share them in the comments

4 points

I always keep a tazer on me. Not for self defense, as I’d be more effective using my fists and the knives I keep taped to them, but so that I can literally jolt myself into action at a moment’s notice.

Think about it. Do you want to enter a fight unprepared? No! So go shock yourself with a tazer BEFORE it starts.

It’s like an activator for my fight response. A button I can push at any time for free adrenaline. When I walk into the DMV I’ll give myself a quick jolt to assert dominance over the office clerks. I’m just too powerful, able to summon a breserker rage at the drop of a dine. Man was never meant to wield such power. Sometimes I set it on a timer to keep me on my toes.

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3 points
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These dudes also like the path of least resistance.

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3 points

looks like a couple of patriots who know how to get quick service

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1 point

Abso-fucking-lutely they do.

Also a couple of patriots who are scared to leave their house for a burrito or a workout.

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Freeze Peach Patriots

!chadmctruthstruth@lemmy.world

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welcome to chad mctruths truth community
where free speech still exists and critical thinking is encouraged

website for patriots only libs do not click

community rules

  • rule 1 - dont be a troll or well cry no exceptions
  • rule 2 - no self promotion unless its relevant to the conversation like if chads stomach hurts and youre mr bismol
  • rule 3 - no downvoting
  • rule 5 - no reporting us to the admins

patriot pro tip

  • if you do things like say freeze peach instead of free speech you can use that as a safety net for when people get mad at you so you can point to it and pretend your ideas were a joke all along and say it was satire even though it wasnt

some acronyms you might see

  • iabt - i agree big time: you said something right
  • idbt - i disagree big time: you said something wrong
  • hbihtaydrtr - hey buddy i have to assume you didnt read the rules: you need to read the rules
  • comprehensive list

what to expect

  • unfiltered and unapologetic posts from real american patriots
  • potentially endless bickering
  • a community that values critical thinking and chads personal individuality
  • hard truths and uncomfortable conversations because we dont coddle people here unless they need it just ask

so if youre ready to join the conversation and speak your mind without fear of reprisal then youre in the right place except this is still .world so you gotta follow their tos okay



other stuff

topsyturvy tuesdays - ttt

  • in case youre craving another layer of irony tuesdays are optionally opposite day where we ironically post lefty memes and you should probably indicate youre doing a topsyturvy post in the title
    • rule 4 - posts or comments that are anti-religious will be pinned okay "ironic” prejudice is funny

banned users:

  • The_Picard_Maneuver@lemmy.world
  • The_Picard_Maneuver@startrek.website

similar communities kind of maybe if they were mashed together:


were only getting paid $11.50/hr to moderate this community so dont expect much from us

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