Will this one-by-one system forever be our main thing or do you think we will break monogamy and maybe “team up” as groups or something?
And yeah polygamy is a thing but do you think it will catch on to “the upper class”?
as long as religion exists polygamy will never be mainstream
Polygamy Polygyny, in particular, is a largely religious institution. In no small part that’s due to the fact that polygamy polygyny is inherently patriarchal, and nearly all modern religions are too, so it makes sense that it would be found predominantly in religious communities and histories.
Polyamory, however, is neither patriarchal or matriarchal. It is freedom for everyone involved to have relationships in any capacity they want, including women and other non-male gendered people to be with whoever they want. Patriarchal societies will never accept something that gives women that type of freedom and power over their own lives.
Edit: I got some terminology wrong and thought polygamy was one man multiple women, but the term just refers to having multiple spouses. Polygyny is one man multiple women. Which def means I took the conversation down a weird hole.
other non-male gendered people to be with whoever they want
right, thanks for enlightening me where your opinion comes from. Not that the constant mention of patriarchy in places it has no relevance wasn’t already a red flag.
I’d still like to highlight the inherent sexism in excluding a single group, in this case males, from your supposed Polyamorous Utopia. If it really was independent of the “patriarchy” or a “matriarchy” there would be no need to single out any gender or sexual orientation no? To me it seems like you are simply trying to invert a perceived victim status instead of abolishing victims entirely. Inverting your ideals from time to time helps illustrate inherent flaws or discrimination, helped me get out of the feminism-hate section of the internet, might help you get out of the all-men-are-evil section.
Not that the constant mention of patriarchy in places it has no relevance wasn’t already a red flag.
… you dont think polygamy is patriarchal?? or “the heavenly father”???
I think the word just triggers you. you know men can participate in polyamory too right?
we’re heading toward monogamy at the main relationship status. Biologicaly it the best model for offspring survival
That is just extended family and friend relationships. Not a whole village of romantic partners.
Maybe that’s why poly is becoming a thing; it makes sense in America since its individualism ensures that children are independent of their parents, and especially extended family most of the time. Back in the day, children would still stay with their parents even when they have children themselves (and this is returning with inflations getting worse. Heck, there are even traditional housing systems where there is one “apartment” that consists of one extended family. But now, at least in the States, children can travel miles away from their family and pay them a visit only once in a while; so there’s no constant handling of children like in the old days. I suppose teachers can fill this role as well, but teachers handle groups of children at the time. They may or may not get individualized needs that need to be addressed that only an adult who lives with them can provide.
Polygamy is great- source: the quran.
Not all of us with different opinion than yours are religious.
Monogamy prevent killing of rival’s baby and protect kids Thoses studies might be biased by moral ground But the correlation between testes size and polygamous relationship is well studied. Right now, Humans fall in the midrange: not as promiscuious as a chimp but not monogamous. But seing how tiny your balls are compared to your dad, we’re certainly heading to full monogamous territory😱
I dont care about teste size.
We have other ways of preventing infanticide.
Not being religious doesn’t mean you don’t have cultural biases rooted in religion.
Linking random articles doesn’t make an argument stronger, just appear stronger.
You really think that we’re at the point as a species where we need to structure our society by comparing it to what chimps do?
I see a future where you’ll need a contract to have a child and it will include support for 21 years between both DNA donors. Most people will lack the financial availability and would not qualify for parenthood. Illegal pregnancies would result in 21 years minimal prison sentence for both DNA donors.
With that, two person contracts will replace the religious concept of marriage. It will require an equal support for both partners financially. The contract would allow separation for domestic violence or failure to produce a human child. No Divorce would be authorized under any other circumstances. No new contracts would be authorized for a new partner if a DNA donor child is under the age of 21.
So yes, if you enter into a contract to produce a child, your stuck with that choice for 21 years.
What a wonderful dystopian future where rape victims (of any gender, mind you!) get punished.
And no divorce either, because humans are very well known for doing well-calculated and all around perfect long-term decisions.
Look, I know why would you want to have something like this in place. But what you have written won’t work (and for several reasons, yes there are more that I just stated above), and more so - it will backfire massively.
Currently in most of the Western world we have very stringent standards that have to be met in order to adopt a child (and quite rightly too in my view). But in order to conceive a child naturally? Nothing, nada, zilch. Full blown neo-nazi? Meth addict? Huge track record of violence? Rapist? Paedophile? All of the above? Find a partner of the opposite sex and you’re good to go! This is a massive inconsistency that I can see we will have to face up to sooner or later, maybe not to the extent you propose, but some sort of minimum standard needs to be put in place for being able to reproduce, for the sake of those children that will otherwise be brought up in horrific, abusive nightmare environments if nothing else.
@waterbogan @YoBuckStopsHere Genuinely curious, how the fuck would we enforce such a law? How many children will be hidden and illegitimate because they were born to someone not allowed to conceive?
I suppose child protective services or your local equivalent exists for this reason - you could expand their ability to take kids away from birth onwards if the parents meet those definitions.
Its a fair question. I think the best approach actually is not to make it illegal for deeply unsuitable individuals to reproduce, but to incentivise them not to. Make contraception freely and easily available, and actually pay them not to have kids. Using a carrot rather than a stick approach like this will be far easier to get across the line and will present less enforcement challenges
Here in the Pacific Northwest, the vast majority of people under 50 seem to be in polyamorous relationships. I’m fairly new to poly, but I’ve done a lot of reading and therapy, and it’s working out pretty well for me.
I do tend to be people’s anchor partner, so I’ve admittedly never experienced the pain that comes from being a secondary when you wish you were a primary. My anchor partner tends more towards relationship anarchy and doesn’t like hierarchical relationships, but i made it clear that my expectation is to be the priority in her life. We’ve made it work, although it takes a lot of communication.
PNW poly gang!
Poly can be such a wild learning curve and so much personal growth. There can be a lot of heartbreak in being poly (my polycule split in half a while back, I’ve gone from 5 to 2 partners this year, my anchor of several years broke up with me over text recently I’m pretty devastated over that one), but so much love too it is all worth it imo. And not having to rely on one person for everything is great for everyone’s mental health. Breakups are a lot easier to manage because you don’t have to seek romantic/physical comfort from strangers or the other side of the breakup, there are other partners around to help comfort you.
And yeah, so much communication, and introspection, and evaluating social norms to figure out what parts are toxic. You really have to learn about your partners and be really clear with boundaries for everything to work well.
It seems like one of my partners is about to be broken up with and I’m bracing to be there for them if/when it happens. I’m going to sardonically laugh my ass off if it happens next week because it’ll be nearly a year to the day that my wife and I broke up, and days before our anniversary. It was definitely surreal last year breaking up with my wife and celebrating my first anniversary with this partner 2 days later.
One of my breakups happened during my most recent tranniversary party, their nesting partner broke up with me the next day, and my (at the time) anchor partner broke up with both of them like a week later. Going to be a little weird next tranniversary is also going to be a ‘polycule implosion’ anniversary. Going in sardonically sounds like a good idea
We have already seen a huge change as it’s much more acceptable to be in more relationships and getting a divorce. If people start to live a lot longer you will see people changing relationships more. With AI there is already worry about people getting into romantic relationships with AI partners.
