I’m male 16, living in Iran for clarification. (English is not my first language so sorry for any mistakes)

I have always struggled with my hair style and look, as I always cut my hair very short and uniform all around because of strict school dress code and policies.

But as I’m getting older I’m starting to want to improve myself and have better mental and physical health.

I’ve become self-conscious of face and looks after the pandemic specifically because I feel left out of many things compared to my peers. One of which is my hair style and cut.

I’m not sure how should I cut, style and maintain my hair. As I mentioned previously I always cut it short and uniform and I showered every 2-3 days, so I’d like to know how to maintain the hair.

But most importantly I don’t know what to tell my barber?

Sorry for the rant and long post.

38 points

The difference between a bad haircut and a good haircut? 2 weeks.

It’s a dumb joke but your hair grows out, so even a haircut that looks bad initially, after a couple of days it looks natural again.

There’s also websites where you can upload an image of your face and try different hairstyles. That way you can “try on” virtually before committing to something in real life.

I think the best haircuts are the low-effort ones that work with your face type and head shape. But you generally just have to try a couple till you find one you like. Since you’re young, I would also try with longer hair since you might not get that chance later in life!

Good luck!

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18 points

Bring a fashion magazine to your barber and point to the style you like. Celebrity photos might help too.

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5 points

I’m very anxious of how I would look and don’t know which style would fit me.

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12 points

If it doesn’t fit you, you can either adjust it immediately if there’s still enough hair left, or it will grow in a couple of weeks if there’s not.

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2 points

Couple of weeks of looking silly sounds like torture for a person with already low self esteem :)

But I will try your advice if I didn’t find anything better.

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4 points

If it doesn’t look good, you can always go back to your old cut and then try again when your hair gets long enough.

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1 point

Preface: I’m US based, I don’t know how barbers work where you’re from.

For me, finding a good barber includes having a conversation about what kind of things Im looking for. This can be as broad as “I don’t really know what fits me” or “I’m looking to go a bit longer so I can style it like this picture of a person with similar hair”.

After a couple of cuts, if I trust the barber can combine what I’m asking for with their skillset along with what they think looks good, I’ll tell them something like “look, I trust your style. You can cut it however you think looks good”. Their job is to cut your hair, but more importantly cut it in a way that makes you happy so that you keep coming back. A good barber will listen to you and get you a good haircut that gives you confidence :)

Good luck!

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15 points
*

I’ve heard that taking magazines is bad from my hairdressers, because everyone has a different face shape and not every haircut is suited for that. It’s better to figure out what your face shape is and look up online which haircuts go with that.

Something like this: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/400538960585397380/)

Also, look up middle eastern hair cuts from your peers, I descend from that region, so our hair tends to be very different from other people. I found this: https://www.pinterest.com/christopherdru/middle-eastern-cuts/ online, there are some cool haircuts there.

I also found this: https://www.arabianbusiness.com/lifestyle/wellness/the-modern-man-s-guide-grooming-601108 article online.

The most important thing is good hygiene: shower daily/everythime you get sweaty. If you can’t shower one day, the minimum should be washing with a washcloth your face, neck, ears, armpits, boy parts (front and back). It’s mostly the same when you take an abdest before praying.

Brush teeth daily two times a day at the least. Floss if you can or have access to a waterpik, that’s easier.

Clip hand and toenails regularly (once a week) and maybe even shape them with a file.

Use deodorant under armpits (but not too much)

Take care of your skin: moisturize with a good cream, you can never start too young. BUT if you have skin problems, visit a dermatologist first. U can also do a face mask every week, clay masks are really good at getting your skin clean.

Don’t forget to let someone do your eyebrows if you have bushy eyebrows, they shape your face too.

These are all tips from a woman, but hey they are valid for men too I guess.

Also, every time I visit Turkey for example, they have these salons where they do everything: hair, nails, feet, facemasks, waxing, … And it’s very cheap. I loved being pampered for a few hours! There should be something like that in Iran for men too, maybe look around a little (depending on your budget of course).

Good luck and remember you’re a work in progress. Trying out different things is the fun stuff, don’t take it too seriously when something doesn’t work well, it grows out really fast.

Edit: on mobile, so format is off

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15 points
*

Not specific to your situation, just a process I recently went through. White female, thick, wavy, unruly hair. For decades, most haircut, style places were white people focused. Most white women have fine, straight hair. These places just didn’t know what to do with me.

Few months back, did research. 2a to 2c hair. Reading stuff online, many people with same hair were black women, sharing tips. So I went to a salon, all black staff and customers. Said, I’m having trouble figuring out what to do with my hair, anyone feel OK educating me?

Nice older black woman said with a smile, come over here white girl, let’s see what we can do. Glad I took a risk. Best haircut, style, ever. She turned me on to a lot of good hair products.

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4 points

I have the coarse wavy hair too. It is one typical European hair type, not uncommon but when I went to barber school we only learned to handle straight hair and what I think of as Black hair, afros, relaxers, fades. Nothing in between, we were just taught to straighten and then heat curl wavy hair, what the fuck?

Anyway - I haven’t cut hair professionally in decades but go to a Cuban hair salon now and she cuts and leaves it wet, the ‘curly hair special’, lol. I go home, style it and send her a picture.

Just wanted to point out that no, most white women don’t have naturally pin straight hair, they straighten it. And yes, it is an education failure in hair school.

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10 points

Try to ask the hairdresser to suggest new styles. I trust them with my hair more than i trust myself.

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