Right now there is a loneliness epidemic throughout the world. More and more people aren’t entering relationships. Gen Z men are having significant trouble dating while there are some economic factors in the mix. From my own view and experiences combined with what I’ve read most Gen Z men are lack the social and communication skills to even enter a relationship. This has and in the future will lead to extreme issues. There’s already been a marked rise in hostility towards women by young men (think Andrew Tate and his ilk) that’s likely born out of this frustration. I would definitely say there’s been a rise in gender hostility ever since the pandemic.
Back in the 50s there was arranged marriages. All a person had to do was just show but now that’s gone because it was an unequal system and I think society missed its chance to establish something much healthier and better in its wake. Now we have people that are unable to connect with each other. We just toss people blindly into the mess that is human interaction and relationships and no one knows what to do anymore. We could be have the most fulfilling relationships humans have ever had. Think of the amount of people who would of never have entered abusive relationships had there been someone around them that showed them what love exactly is.
The way we teach is so heavily focused on teaching people how to be worker drones that we forget the human part of the person. This is why a lot of people who do extreme well in school and college fare so poorly in relationships and have higher rates of depression. We are the most educated and advanced in human history, we know psychology, we can teach this shit rather than tossing people blindly into the meat grinder.
I would like to see people educated how to argue without getting personal. And how to communicate that you aren’t in a mood to argue right now, because you’re angry and wouldn’t listen.
A good start for sure would be to learn to listen and understand, not listen to answer.
I could see that being an overall skill but likely won’t result in people leaving their basements and developing some social skills.
Yes but it is only one and it is rather a minor one when it comes to socializing in a group or getting you out of the basement. Unless you are the type that immediately starts a conflict with strangers in which case you might have anger issues.
That might help people in relationships mind you and that would have some value.
The part about gen Z men has been true for every generation’s men.
Not true. Its never been as bad as 63% not in relationships and 15% having no close friendships. Its clearly an issue that has gotten worse evertime. Why do you think this period of time is known as the loneliness epidemic.
A vast majority of the non-Western world doesn’t see juvenile relationships as conventional or even a good thing. In fact, youngsters fooling around with the opposite sex without parental consent is straight-up delinquent behaviour in almost the entirety of the Middle-East and Asia. What you call “bad” is rather ideal for the better half of the world.
The middle east isn’t exactly a shining example of healthy gender relations
You mean in the middle east where women are basically seen as property in most of those countries. Literally not able to leave the house without a chaperone. Or you mean Asian countries like South Korea which is facing the same issues to such an extent that incel like public policies are bring implemented or Japan which again is facing literally the exact same problems.
What do you think a shotgun wedding is? We definitely did, and still do have arranged and forced marriages in the US. Probably moreso now that child brides are making a comeback, thanks to the loss of abortion rights. Thanks, Republicans.
Shotgun wedding was simply someone got pregnant and the couple may have been encouraged to wed. I seen enough of them and I don’t know if a single one where it was mandatory. Poor reason to get married maybe but was pretty much always but choice and the shotgun statement was more of a joke.
There are few racial cultures in Canada, and likely no European cultures that have arranged ‘forced’ marriages. Encouraging couples to interact in such a way as they might develop feelings for each other is not an forced marriage by the way. And before you get all huffy, yes there have been forced marriages but it is quite rare.
Can we just restate this as: “A lot of society’s problems could be avoided if parents actually put in effort to parent their children” ?
Through easy access to education, societal support, and a safety net.
There are many parents out there who were able to break the cycle of trauma and raise children in positive environments. But almost every single one of them talks about how they had the privilege of the support of friends, therapists, teachers, obs/gyn doctors, whatever, to help break the patterns
There’s a reason “It takes a village to raise a child” is an idea that is prevalent across so many cultures. The concept of the nuclear family was a tool to sell more real estate, and we are seeing the consequences of that societal shift today.
No amount of reasonable legislation can force parents to teach this stuff. Doing it through schools is infinitely easier.
It also helps provide a social standard that anyone can relate to. Seems weird to demand that parents should be the ones solely responsible to make sure their children are able to socialize properly. That just means they’re main reference for socializing is just their parents.
Considering the sheer amount of time people spend in schools during essentially all of their formative years, it’d be a terrible idea not to implement legislation that could prevent maladaptive behaviors in our populace. Schools are already affected by legislation via the Mindless Drone Initiative established by our industrial forefathers. We might as well update things to make it a Healthy Human Endeavor instead. Finger-wagging at imaginary parents is going to do fuck all by comparison.
Possibly. How about the reality that people are simply not interacting in person but online. I can’t believe this is not the first post.
Seriously go out to a bar, a music festival, volunteer, hell get drunk a few times and loosen up. In the 70, 80, 90 right up till 2000 this was every weekend. Hell it is not some work drone thing. That is an excuse. Work later in life is where you actually might meet some friends and from there have drinks after work and maybe that results in a random meeting with some ladies or men in your life.
School won’t teach this. Life skills need practice not exams.
Seriously go out to a bar, a music festival, volunteer, hell get drunk
As a non-drinker I find it interesting that 2 out of these 3 things require the use of a drug. (Yes I know, you can order water at bars, but I doubt that was the point of that statement.)
While true, only one of those things you listed don’t require money, and tbh even volunteering is hard when you have to work 2-3 jobs to get by.
Kids and adults these days don’t have 3rd places to just relax and hang out anymore. The internet is arguably the cheapest way to hang out.
Sorry but our parents worked more than us and their parents worked more then them. Few people I know work weekends or don’t get two days a week off. Your parents worked normal 8 hours day then they went home and worked on their cars and houses and basically did another 4 hours a day doing of jobs. Their parents went one step further and built their own houses often or helped build them and grew alot of their own food.
We might work similar or more formal hours but we work far less informal hours that at any period in history. So that does not hold much water to me.
Fwiw we are learning more and more that most of what makes an adult isn’t nurture at all. It’s almost all nature.
Helicopter or hands-off parenting? The choice won’t impact a kid as much as you think. August 11, 20239:23 AM
https://www.npr.org/transcripts/1193176710
Also, great parents still end up with perfectly shit children all the time.
People online just love playing the blame game on others for an individuals actions though lmfao. Poor upbringing, neglect, trauma, all of that is only one part of explaining someone’s actions. It doesn’t remove the responsibility and free will of the person commiting them lol.
https://www.npr.org/2010/07/15/128542130/sometimes-good-parents-produce-bad-kids
The influence of parenting is extremely overestimated. I think that is also a symptom of a society where people are reluctant to take on responsibility for themselves. Which is also a reason why people lack community because both (responsibility for oneself and functioning relationships) rely on introspection.
Things I wish they’d teach kids:
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Yoga (one of my niece’s school teaches them basic yoga)
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breathing / meditation
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conflict resolution
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critical thinking skills / logic
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relationship skills eg knowing your self-worth, knowing how and when to say no, knowing about your own body and that it’s inviolable. If my youngest niece doesn’t want to give me a hug goodbye and her mum says “go on give your uncle a hug” I always make a point of saying it’s fine, she doesn’t have to hug anyone she doesn’t want to
Yup. We wonder why young people are committing suicide more often when their entire self worth is based on how good they do in school. You combine that with late stage capitalism necessitating two parents working meaning the child might not even see them that much. More kids are neglected with their grades being the only source of validation. It would help so much of them being taught how to love themselves.
I would add: teaching that romantic relationships are not the end all and be all of life.
I feel like this is part of the problem, because it creates misogyny, incels and depression when people have their entire self-worth wrapped up in another person liking them. Any person. All of our media pushes this message, especially to young people. I was a serial monogamist all my life until several years ago. I’ve been more productive and accomplished and more in touch with who I am than I’ve ever been. I don’t have the need fpr another person in my life, and that’s how it should be. A partner should be an addition to a person and a life that is already functional. I can’t help but notice now how every. single. song, movie, show, book, etc. is not just about romance, but about another person making someone’s life worth living. It’s fucked up and we need to teach kids that they are enough, by themselves, and that being in a relationship is a choice. It’s not mandatory.
yeah I could not believe how late I was exposed to logic and that I would not have been exposed without college and it needs no high level math or anything to learn. I also wish the time spent in gym was actually useful. any martial art would do to me as well but yoga or tai chi would prevent issues around learining fighting. breathing and meditation should really come from any of that if done decently.
It’s quite scary to think that not only are kids not being taught logic, but many are being taught anti-logic; magical thinking etc. It blows my mind that right wingers screech about ‘grooming’ and indoctrination while they’re teaching their kids divisive skybeardguy nonsense. Literally grooming them to be religious.
Imo this is why they pushback and create false equivalence, because they know they’re losing their sad little foothold. Notice how whoever is downvoting comments in this thread has nothing to say.
We had all those things on the curriculum in the Montessori I went to as a little kid
