I was thinking about sentences that can tell the entire story on their own. I have 2 common examples:

  • So, I started to play WOW
  • My husband was 20 older than me

I can already tell how is gonna develop and end. What other sentences you know that have this effect?

71 points

“I’m not racist, but” oh, they are going to say something racist.

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46 points

It’s fun to put “I’m not racist but” in front of totally innocuous statements.

I’m not racist but there’s a blue Hyundai parked outside my building.

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9 points

It still works. If I heard that my first thought would be “who are they racist against?”

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7 points

“I’m not racist but the weather is nice today“

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1 point
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25 points

See also, “Nobody likes to say it out loud, but…”

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19 points
*

“The hard truth is…” something completely obvious.

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11 points

Something completely untrue.

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1 point

“I’m not gay but…” proceeds to say the gayest thing you have ever heard.

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42 points
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22 points

“I promise” followed by anything. That thing will 100% not happen.

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6 points

I Promise I will get a girlfriend.

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9 points

I promise i will NOT get a girlfriend.

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5 points
*

The universe works out the logic of this statement, weighs the pros and cons of complying, ultimately decides to just shut things down.

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4 points

I promise that in a few hours the sun will rise.

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4 points

You’ve done doomed us all, donnie!

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4 points

I promise that I am lying to you right now

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15 points

My husband is 20 years older than me, we have been together 17 years, what is your autocomplete for this?

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9 points

“… and then he told me I should be a stay at home wife, and I accepted, we had 5 kids after we initially agreed to only have one but he pressured me, we moved to his hometown where I knew no one, he controlled all of my finances, after 12 years of marriage I confronted him for cheating on me but he always denied it, until I found his second family but I couldn’t leave him because I had no money of my own and lived far away from my family, then he became physically abusive and telling me that I was nothing without him, I needed help to leave him but im still fighting in court over child support and shared custody, but he is now with his third family and refuses to pay for nothing, I should have left him a long while ago but I couldn’t see the red flags and even my family thought at the time it was a bad idea to marry him but they knew I wouldn’t listen because I was 20 and naïve”

I’ve seen so many cases with different variations.

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12 points

Well, we’re gay, I’m the breadwinner and no fighting over custody of anyone.

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9 points

Cool. So nice to hear. Congratulations.

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14 points

Have you heard of GME?

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4 points

💎🙌

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