125 points

Nah, TCP is still just kicking the box over, but just kicking it over again, if the reciever doesn’t kick back a box saying they got it.

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64 points
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TCP is also deciding to ramp up the amount of boxes you kick over until the post worker gets crushed by boxes, at which point you decide to lower your box-kicking rate by half and try again.

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29 points

Best explanation of congestion I’ve seen in a while

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8 points

I wrote an anology up and hated it, so I discarded it. Glad someone else nailed it.

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6 points

Well yes, internally that’s what it does, but from a user perspective it just looks like being handed the package, you never see any of the failed attempts (unless delivery fails completely because the company went out of business). It’s sorta more like having a butler who orders it for you and deals with any potential BS that might happen, and then just hands you the package when it finally arrives in one piece.

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4 points

Like Jim Carey in Ace Ventura?

For those that may have forgotten: https://youtu.be/WjTDXatmzUE

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73 points
*

UDP seems more like a ball fired from canon to me. You may not be prepared for it and you won’t know what state it’s in when it gets here, but that packet is making it to the gate no matter what. Or, in the rare case it doesn’t, it means someone else is having a real bad time.

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31 points

You forgot to mention that you might get it twice, or thrice, or more, and in different versions.

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28 points

You’re right. I forgot that grapeshot is always something to worry about.

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9 points

(novice) Why would you get UDP packets multiple times? UDP doesn’t check for acceptance I thought.

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20 points

From StackOverflow:

Switches will send packets to all interfaces when using broadcasts or under extreme conditions (full MAC Address Table). This can lead to duplication if there is a loop between two or more switches and if the Spanning Tree Protocol is not used. So the answer is rarely.

https://stackoverflow.com/questions/9196791/duplicate-udp-packets-how-often-it-happens#9220574

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7 points

Protocols using UDP often dial in some features of TCP at the application layer, and resend packets as needed.

The meme is funny and all, but real world use of UDP is pretty sophisticated.

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23 points

Sorry I didn’t get this UDP joke…

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35 points

Well I ain’t just gonna repeat it…

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11 points

Just keep tossing packages over a tall fence, say “I guess that’ll do it”, then shrug and walk away.

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3 points

Because you’re so prepared for a guy kicking a parcel over the fence. It’s the same analogy my dude.

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5 points

The kick over the fence means they took enough care to carry it as far as your fence. UDP lobs it from one town over.

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54 points

I mean I’ve been trying to formally request that ISO change the C API for send() to yeet() for sockets where connection reliability is not required at the network interface level.

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10 points

Well, thank you, now I’m creating that exact macro in every company repo where send/sendto is used.

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8 points

that’s fucking brilliant lol

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6 points

Welp, time for a new language!

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5 points

That would be awesome! xD

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50 points

There’s nothing wrong with UDP. At least not that I know of.

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5 points
17 points

thank God I can’t read

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2 points

You are unstoppable!

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16 points

Didn’t hear you there

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4 points

Not my problem.

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5 points

Not really a problem with UDP itself, but with some very old protocols like DNS that rely on UDP but can’t be changed because of compatibility. If you’re writing a new service that uses UDP, there’s nothing stopping you from designing it so that it doesn’t provide an opportunity for bandwidth amplification.

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3 points

It’s technically not a bug if it’s operating as intended

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45 points

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6 points

Jesus christ SSH

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3 points

Can’t understand the VPN one shouldn’t the traffic pass through the VPN and then go to the user like the ssh one …

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5 points

The person on the right of the VPN image is the destination server

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5 points

Isn’t the can the vpn server and the guys are just vpn users?

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