77 points

There is an app called “Zombies, run!” that literally uses the same idea, but with zombies instead of lions. It basically makes you listen to a story where you go looking for supplies and every so often, you get chased down by a horde of zombies and it uses your phone’s motion sensor to track whether you’re moving fast enough to escape them.

permalink
report
reply
18 points

This sounds fun got to try it :D

permalink
report
parent
reply
7 points

Yeah, but it doesn’t make you think that you’re actually being chased by zombies because you know you’re not being. It’s just a fun game. It’s not going to increase testosterone levels. It’s just about being healthy.

OP here is just been thick.

permalink
report
parent
reply
0 points

Well neither does imagining being chased by lions then. Unless you have really good imagination, I guess. But I imagine in that case, either would work.

permalink
report
parent
reply
46 points

I love when anons post “I’m going to put a giant magnet in front of my car to pull it forward without gas. Any scientific proof that it works?” as if they didn’t just pull this bullshit directly out of their own schizophrenia.

permalink
report
reply
8 points

Schizo posting is the best kind of posting

permalink
report
parent
reply
6 points

Well, they do say that 2 heads are better than one

permalink
report
parent
reply
1 point
*

So a maglev train / magnetic crane? As far as ideas go, that one is not only possible, it is real and practical. When you get right down to it, electric cars are basically electricity creating magnetic forces to spin the drive shaft to pull the car forward without gas.

It isn’t so much about schizophrenia than it is about trying to laugh about why its absurd and it won’t work before trying to see where it would and why and where it might.

permalink
report
parent
reply
27 points

The funniest part of this is the title of the OP. “Lions chasing me.” Tells you nothing about the actual post but makes it that much funnier

permalink
report
reply

I’m going to edit the post title to match this.

permalink
report
parent
reply
16 points

Why are total dipshits always obsessed with their t levels

permalink
report
reply
5 points

I really wonder about this. Where I live, there are near-constant “men’s clinic” commercials, especially on the radio, and I’m just curious about how widespread a problem “low-t” actually is? Is basically every man over 30 struggling to get it up?

Or are these clinics just trying desperately to convince men that they need their services?

permalink
report
parent
reply
2 points

Because I have the only people who care.

permalink
report
parent
reply
2 points
*

Because, for them it’s really just a shirt.

permalink
report
parent
reply
15 points

I tend to think that the testosterone increase would come from absolute terror, and fleeing in panic, but OP will know that the lions roaring is only a recording. He’ll know he can stop if one of his shoes is uncomfortable, ffs. That changes the scenario a bit.

permalink
report
reply
4 points

Maybe sounds that might actually happen around OP happening randomly and also realistic sounding. Like a car beeping right next to them or aggressive dogs right on their heel. Would probably only work for a bit.

permalink
report
parent
reply

Greentext

!greentext@sh.itjust.works

Create post

This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you’re new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

  • Anon is often crazy.
  • Anon is often depressed.
  • Anon frequently shares thoughts that are immature, offensive, or incomprehensible.

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

Community stats

  • 6.6K

    Monthly active users

  • 994

    Posts

  • 39K

    Comments