Far-right influencer Rogan O’Handley went so far as to suggest that if the Chiefs won the Super Bowl, Swift and Kelce would trigger an apocalyptic chain of events that would kill millions. “You MUST defeat the Chiefs,” O’Handley wrote in an X post addressed to the San Francisco 49ers. “If you don’t, Mr. Pfizer and his girlfriend are going to tour the country as ‘world champions’ helping elect Joe Biden WW3 will likely follow in a 2nd Biden term and millions will die. The fate of the free world rests upon your shoulders”
Just wow. Only a tidbit of the crazy they are spouting in this article.
I don’t get it.
Why would the cabal, the super influential group secretly controlling all our actions, need a football team to win the superbowl to defeat them, and why would they, in all their Machiavellian wisdom, not have considered the 50% chance event that their football team loses?
Why would they pick Biden for another term then start WW3? Why not just start it now if that’s what they want and he’s already their puppet? They’ve had 3 years and there’s certainly enough political tinder in the world to start a fire.
None of this makes any coherent sense.
You know what, I’ve thought about this some more and the reasoning is clear.
If the 49ers win, they’ll inadvertantly resurrect Harvey Milk, who will kill JFK (who faked his own death and has been lying in wait), who will then be unable to reclaim the last months of his presidency (his term was never officially ended you know) which he planned to use to restore Donald Trump to power. Harvey Milk will then become president and make heterosexuality illegal and force us to live in 15 minute neighborhoods.
That must be their angle! They win either way!
There’s one key piece you’re missing, Joe Montana is actually resurrected Harvey Milk & has been this whole time.
This plan began back when Joe was winning Super Bowls, but Steve Young was an unexpected hiccup. The queer stopped spreading as fast when Joe got traded.
This Superbowl has been chosen specifically because Montana played for both the Chiefs & the 49ers, & because Joe Montana is also Taylor Swift.
They were going to do it 4 years ago, but Joe was still Arianna Grande back then.
It’ll all make sense when Andy Reid eats Travis Kelce during halftime.
Excuse my ignorance, but is there something going around about 15-minute neighborhoods? Someone pretty kooky mentioned something about that to me just today (in relation to Chattanooga, I think, but I didn’t exactly follow the crazy train of thought). Something about how they’re monitoring everyone and they can’t take more than 100 trips outside that zone or something. I know it’s all nonsense but there’s also usually some tie back into reality.
It’s because so much conspiracy theory requires the conspirators to be simultaneously all powerful but hilariously weak and stupid. And all their plans have to be announced and hinted at through pop culture and in ways that are suspiciously similar to popular movies and TV shows as remembered by people with no media literacy.
$0.02:
Optimistically: they’re just crazy. Some have access to a louder bullhorn than others, but it’s just garden variety insanity.
Pessimistically: someone has a huge pile of cash riding on the outcome of the game, and is making a Hail Mary pass of their own to sway the outcome.
This is my response to all conspiracy theories. If this deep state cabal is so powerful, and has access to unlimited resources to achieve their agenda, wouldn’t it be easier to just declare martial law and send the deep state army in to drag us all into the streets, point a gun at our heads and say comply or die? Why the theatrics? Is the deep state the Joker? Why not just shoot Batman in the head and be done with it?
Trump sycophant Laura Loomer wrote on X that “the Democrats’ Taylor Swift election interference psyop is happening in the open… They are going to use Taylor Swift as the poster child for their pro-abortion GOTV Campaign.”
This shit sounds like deepfried AI hallucinations, but I know people are actually that dumb.
And they’ll somehow always find ways to bring you to a loss for words even when you expect the absolutely deepest level of stupidity and craziness you can imagine. These past handful of years have just been a constant shattering of expectations of how dumb and fucked up people manage to be. And 90% of it is coming from right-wing fanatics.
If the guy is endorsing a team from San Francisco, the capital of libruls and the gay, he must be part of the conspiracy.
Why are there people so convinced that football, or the outcome of any sporting event, matters at all? Like I know that this is just some media manipulators trying to stir people up, but I also fully believe that they will succeed and that the number of people who will find this argument compelling will be depressing (though who knows, maybe humanity will have a pleasant surprise).
Why are there people so convinced that football, or the outcome of any sporting event, matters at all?
“You MUST defeat the Chiefs,” O’Handley wrote in an X post addressed to the San Francisco 49ers. “If you don’t, Mr. Pfizer and his girlfriend are going to tour the country as ‘world champions’ helping elect Joe Biden WW3 will likely follow in a 2nd Biden term and millions will die. The fate of the free world rests upon your shoulders”
But hey, no pressure or anything guys.
I don’t get it, do the Chiefs have Swift and Kelce as spokespeople or something? Why would they tour with Chiefs, if that’s what they’re saying.
Travis Kelce plays for the chiefs, Taylor and Travis are dating. Taylor is present at many chiefs games and almost surely will be at the Super Bowl. Taylor is very outspoken about the need to vote, rarely if ever says who to vote for but presses the need to have your voice heard. Republicans and other fascists know that their policies are wildly unpopular, especially with the youth, and so hate the idea of anyone encouraging the youth or anyone else to vote and possibly outnumber the hateful citizens that normally vote for republicans
I’m continually impressed at how good Joe Biden is at running this vast, secret, deep state network of people rigging everything… while being so bad at anything else.
Obligatory definitions of fascism #8:
Fascist societies rhetorically cast their enemies as “at the same time too strong and too weak”.
Kind of how jews are supposedly inferior while also secretly running everything.
Lmao what the actual fuck 🤣
My right wing neighbor dropped this conspiracy on me a few months ago, when Kelce and Swift just started dating. His thought was that Kelce had a COVID vaccine commercial, and the government was using him and Swift to reach a broader population of little girls to brainwash them into getting the vaccine for the “fake disease”.
I haven’t followed up with him on it, but now that the Chiefs are in the Super Bowl, I’m sure he’s doubling down on his crazy conspiracy theory. I guess I shouldn’t say “his” theory. I didn’t realize it at the time, because I don’t mainline Fox News and News Max, but I guess this must have been something my neighbor heard on some crazy show at some point.
That has to be the lamest conspiracy theory of 2024, and we’re only in January. Strap in, kids. It’s election year and it’s finna be a doozy.
Hahahahahahaha bahahahahahaaa. Oh wait… They’re serious. Let me laugh even harder BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAHQHAHAH!
There’s a Q six letters in. There’s 12 months in a year, which is 6x2. That means THIS YEAR BIDEN RIGGED THE SUPER BOWL! It’s clearly an admission from a secret agent associatied with Q.
/s just in case it’s needed, because we live in the dumbest of all possible time lines.
Careful, every time we say we live in the dumbest possible timeline somebody on the other side says hold my beer.
