Go out and do things then. That’s why I started traveling more. I go on scuba adventures and eat lots of good food. You gotta work hard to play hard.
EDIT: To clarify, I work hard to play hard. As in, I worked my way up the corporate ladder and now have staff that I manage. I still have to write code and am in meetings all day. I did not get the job from family connections and found it through going out and networking with people. I still have 90k in student loans from my MBA, but make too much money to get any handouts, which is honestly kind of annoying since I’ve been paying them off for years at the government’s predatory rates. Refinanced only recently when interest rates tanked during the pandemic. I am what you would call a Geriatric Millennial or a Xennial as I was born in the early 80’s. I don’t come from exceptional wealth, but had a good upbringing. I think people need to stop complaining victimhood, as I’m forced to do with the loans stupidity and own their situation. Sure, it sounds like a Boomer thing to say, but what choice do we have. There is plenty of room to hustle and get ahead. Yeah, I get to do cool activities and travel, but I’m also choosing not to have kids. It’s definitely a game of figuring out what your values are. The system is never going to be perfect, so you might as well figure out how to make it work for you instead of being little bitches.
You might be surprised, but there is quite a chunk of people who can’t afford such a luxury.
This is definitely the most tone deaf, privileged comment I’ve read on this site so far.
You gotta work hard to play hard.
It’s just that a lot of people work very, very hard, but they still don’t get to play hard. It’s not the 60’s anymore where working hard was enough to be reasonably wealthy.
Such an unbelievably inconsiderate take this is…
Perhaps they chose to have children ahead of being able to afford them and haven’t attempted to find a better job. People tend to create their own traps. Sure, the game is hard right now, but there are plenty of winners. I had a really bad job once and learned a lot from it about being a better boss than he was. Before that, I was an on-the-road consultant. Made great money doing that, but couldn’t establish a social life. Was all about finding the right fit. Starting out at my corporate gig wasn’t sunshine and rainbows. I had cubicles outside the HR office and hear people get yelled at my the hostile person in charge. What I learned though was how to win people over and find a mentor. The mean HR lady became my ally and watched out for me. She was nice, but had a hard exterior. Still perfecting my social skills. I’m a beast at what I do, but I wouldn’t get very far if I wasn’t nice to people. Finding out all the time that people like to talk about themselves and feel useful. I read a lot of books on everything and regret whenever I consider having a defeatist attitude. Just finished a Ulysses S. Grant biography. That dude packed, so much into a short period of time and had a lot of my eccentricities. He’s a testament to how you can learn to be the best at something by applying yourself fully and valuing relationships.
Your response suggests that you consider yourself a role model, someone who has all the answers and an ideal life. It makes me wonder how things would be if everyone were like you.
Throughout history, we’ve seen problems arise from people who believe they are always right and have everything figured out. It’s interesting to encounter someone in their late 30s or early 40s who holds such strong convictions.
When I read your words and see the topics you respond to, it’s clear that there’s a contrast between your apparent lifestyle of travel and luxury and the underlying feelings of dissatisfaction, anger, and insecurity. It’s surprising that you don’t seem to realize how noticeable this contrast is to others.
You have a mentality of “if I can do it, anyone can,” which can be seen as positive and uplifting. However, it can also be viewed as privileged, narrow-minded, and even arrogant.
I do not normally act on the temptation to be critical in this way, but I have to say that I wouldn’t want to be one of the staff members you “manage.”
If you are even lucky enough to live that long and still have decent health.
I have been lucky. I had the opportunity to engage in periods of retirement in my 30s and 40s. The idea that this was possible radically changed my decision making about spending money. I’m very grateful.
If you have any excess money at all, then buy only what you value, not what you can afford.
Do you mind sharing a bit about how you were able to take a long break? I’m really interested in doing something like this before I turn 30; I’ve been working since 21
I don’t mind. I got very lucky. Your results will vary.
For the book length version, read Your Money or Your Life. Alternatively, You Need A Budget would also suffice.
I should also point out that when I took a long break, I still worked for money, but I got to choose what I did and I went periods of months doing almost nothing. I don’t want to oversell what retirement meant to me.
The ingredients were these:
- high-pay/low-time jobs (software development consultant and trainer)
- geographical flexibility: no fixed office, but instead I traveled to visit clients and conferences
- downsized living expenses: left Toronto and moved to the middle of nowhere, which was riskier when high-speed internet was just becoming available
- wife had compatible ideas and goals regarding money, so almost no big arguments about what to do
- few family ties to keep us in one place: we noticed that after we moved away, when we visited family, the visits meant much more than weekly Sunday dinner
- found high-leverage income streams (closer to “passive”) that fit our temperament and provided background profits to pay for essential living expenses
I got lucky along the way, finding a business partner with whom I worked for about five years and who found us a very lucrative contract that put the whole plan on fast-forward. Even so, I found him by attending conferences, talking to people, organizing my own, and mostly being open to whatever came my way. When we are consumed with day-to-day survival, it’s easy not to take those kinds of risks.
I don’t know how well this overall strategy works in today’s economic conditions. Some of the principles, I think, still apply, but I genuinely don’t know how lucky I really got to go as far as I did by age 35. (We left Toronto when I was 33 and that alone sped up the results a lot.)
Read the books, if you haven’t already. Good luck.
I mean… sure?
With my job at the moment, I don’t need to go out and tend a garden or hunt for food for my family. I don’t need to carry water from a source and then find a way to clean it. I have light and warmth at a flick of a switch. I don’t need to wash my clothes by hand.
So at the moment, I’m ‘enjoying’ not having to do all of the above, by providing a single service that then opens up all of the above to me.
And I can also find time to type shit on the internet.
But if your not enjoying or can even tolerate whatever job you have to provide the above, then you can certainly go back to looking after your needs solo.
Here in sweden you can totally live just fine off of 50% work hours and i have no plans of working more than that.
it boggles my mind that people choose to work longer hours and not save up the money to retire at like 45
