I knew this guy. He always wanted to suck my Schlong or f with me. Told him i ain’t gay. He replied he neither, he just finds vaginas disgusting (Women in general, Vaginas just being the “most disgusting” part) and schlongs beautiful, hence it’s not gay at all. He just prefers guys coz they have said dingdongs.
Told him that was somehow very gay. He got really really really pissed at me for hinting he might be gay. He hates gays and find them repulsive. It was at this point that i realized, he verbally held me hostage. How to reply to that? I didn’t know.
EDIT: That wasn’t a joke or satire, he was dead-serious about it. That level of cognitive dissonance is hard to find, even in religious people :-)
I wonder if he beats himself up after jerking off because he just gave some homo a handy
The question that now comes to my mind: What is gay exactly? Is this specifically just when you like dicks? Or are also looks coming into okay here?
Are you also gay if you like people who look like women but have a penis? If yes, are you then straight if you prefer people that look like men but have a vagina?
Afaik there are also people that have both. If you fall in love with them without having ever seen their genitals, are you then still automatically gay?
Never thought about that before tbh.
Man, the more society progresses in open and honest conversations about sexuality, the more I’m sure that “spectrum” doesn’t even begin to do justice to the vast, bizarre complexity of human sexuality.
It’s more like…that crazy 3 tier chess they play in Star Trek.
Spectrum is fine and all, but gay is gay. If gay would mean many things, the word would be useless. It already became useless for its original meaning, let’s not kill it again :-)
The age old question of do the traps be, in fact, gay
To which the answer is that there is no gay, no straight, nothing makes any fucking sense, everyone is bisexual (or asexual) but also there is no bisexuality (or asexuality)
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I honestly have no idea what it is, if it’s society, if it’s internal, no idea, but I’m absolutely 100% not aroused by men at all, and just knowing a m2f transgender person once had the biological parts of a man is enough to kill any arousal that could have been.
Not that it’s a common question, but my “answer” to “could I ever date/sleep with a transgender person” is “I’m not mature enough to be comfortable with that.” I blame myself in some way, but I am “repulsed” by the idea (not repulsed by the person, just the thought of intercourse)
I hope it doesn’t need to be said, but just to be sure: I want everyone to be able to live their best life and to be happy and accepted, I have no hate for transgender people or anyone (except billlionares, private insurance companies and maybe some landlords)
Sucking a cock doesn’t make you gay. Only wanting to suck dicks and finding women unattractive and NBs unappealing? Yeah, you might be pretty gay. But if you just want to fuck with the occasional dick sometimes? You’re not gay. There are a million different variations that don’t make you gay. Some of them involve penises, sure.
Well in his case it wasn’t just the dick itself. Women were “disgusting”. So the dick needed to be attached to a manly man.
What exactly is gay? To me it’s when a manly man likes manly men. If you’d fall in love with a woman and THEN see her male genitals, it wouldn’t be gay. She just was an ass to not tell you earlier 😁 If you’d see both genitals or none, it wouldn’t be either. And yes, there always have been those with both or none.
This begs the question (possibly a stupid question on my part since I’m not very knowledgeable on the topic): if he had a genital preference for wangs, and a sexual preference for trans women, would he in fact be considered straight, or is there another classification for this?
Dude, i honestly don’t know if a guy liking an mtf-trans with a dong is considered gay. I would prefer said mtf-trans-with-dong over a manly-man-with-vayajay. I consider myself straight. If i HAD to choose which of those only 2 alternatives would be more attractive. So I’d guess it’s more the person/gender than the primary genital. But what do i know :-)
Nah, he disliked woman in general, the vagina was just the “most disgusting” part beside the tatas :-)
Dude. Who doesn’t like tatas? I understand not liking genitals – there’s nothing particularly visually attractive about most V’s or P’s, when you’re not aroused. But boobs? Just about everyone can agree that boobs are attractive.
here’s the thing, there is a perceived idea that being gay means that you fit into “gay culture” and all the aesthetic ideas that go along with it, which is not exactly what’s real (at least, this is my perception as a mostly straight ally).
So these guys think, I don’t like the way the sterotype of a gay person behaves in my head. I don’t belong in that group of people. Sure I want to suck a dick, but I don’t want to go see a drag show or act like a woman (not my opinion here) so I’m not gay. I just want to jerk off with my buds.
that’s why they had to come up with the definition of MSM. People basically think “gay? I’m not gay! I fucked Jim in the ass yesterday, but that doesn’t mean I’m gay.”
onion article that’s kinda related to what I’m trying to express : https://www.theonion.com/gay-pride-parade-sets-mainstream-acceptance-of-gays-bac-1819566014
“My understanding was that gay people are just like everybody else–decent, hard-working people who care about their communities and have loving, committed relationships,” Weber said. “But, after this terrifying spectacle, I don’t want them teaching my kids or living in my neighborhood.”
basically this
Either he was a closeted gay or a closeted time traveler from Ancient Greece
There are men that present as straight, have wives, and occasionally engage in gay sex.
most people are probably bisexual anyways, i mean back in ye olden days anything with a hole was prone to penetration because society accepted it (don’t ask about lesbian sex tho)
This is why the term “Men who have sex with Men” or MSM was coined. Trying to study the spread of HIV/AIDS was impossible before that because these men don’t identify as gay.
I have had more “straight” guys send me dick picks and ask if we can hook up (at my place, obviously) than I can count.
I wonder how many of them have little to no sexual or romantic interest in persons presenting as their gender? Like, I’m trying to mentally map someone who likes to engage in sexual activities with someone of the same gender and yet only really have an attraction to a part of that gender, rather than be attracted to the entirety of the person as many of us are.
There’s gotta be a legitimate term for this.
I like dicks a lot more than dudes in general, I think. Dudes still kinda hot but dicks are aweaome. I just go by bi, pan might be more appropriate? Idk. Whatever
I’m heteroromantic and pansexual, if that’s what you mean. I’m down to have sex and attracted sexually to people, regardless of their gender, but I don’t want to date women. I don’t get butterflies about women (maybe once or twice in my life), and I just don’t have the romantic pull towards them that I do men.
My husband is actually about the same. He’s never dated or really wanted to date men, but he does enjoy having sex with them. He tends to just identify as bi (as do I, if I’m not being really specific), but also rarely volunteers any information about it, which most people assume means straight, especially given he has a wife.
This makes sense. I’ve struggled to follow the different monikers and identities. Fully, I just accept people and recognize and respect what they want to be identified as to the best of my ability, and apologize if I forget as I adjust. Thank you for putting terms to it. I didn’t realize Pansexual meant that in context.
Lactose curious is a thing, one of my coworkers will have dairy on special occasions and plans for the aftermath
A few colleagues would make drinking games of shenanigans like this.
I even know couples who have set up tinders for each other and see who can get the most matches or starters.
It may indirectly affect the other users experiences unfortunately.
Well I would assume most people using these apps knows not every match or conversation will go somewhere.
Theres also a massive difference to be upfront like the meme, and dragging it out and leading them on.
If you are just looking for likes or matches, where’s the harm in that?
I even know couples who have set up tinders for each other and see who can get the most matches or starters.
Sounds healthy. I can’t see how this could ever go wrong /s
I’ve ran into cis women on Grindr. My mom called them the super non-PC term “fag hags.” That’s the bad F word for those on Lemmy World cuz I’m pretty sure that word is censored on that instance.
Lemmy.world censors only “faggot” and the N word. Lemmy.ml censors “bitch” and various slurs. I believe their users can still see comments with these words in (?), though the censored words are removed if they post them themselves
Am I missing something? I have absolutely no idea what you guys are talking about.
Is there a slur somewhere in this post or the comment section? And TIL that Lemmy communities can censor words. I’m from blahaj.zone btw
Lemmy instances are able to censor words; it can’t be set per community. When viewing a comment from an instance that censors some word, that word will be replaced with “removed”. This applies to both comments sent by users of that instance, and comments sent by external users.
Blahaj doesn’t censor any slurs
feddit.uk doesn’t censor anything at the moment, because I accidentally broke the slur regex.
Normally, users from censored instances can still see rude words, they just get removed “in flight” if they try to post anywhere.
Well the first one has basically one meaning that’s derogatory (including the definition of a bundle of sticks used for kindling; that’s literally why it became a slur as it implies you want to burn them) while the three letter word is also slang for a cigarette in much of the world.
The non-offensive word I have seen used for a person who seeks out relationships with homosexual people despite being the opposite gender is “beard”. This is derived from the fact that it helps the male in the relationship present outwardly as a “real man” with a “normal relationship” in settings/societies where homosexuality is not considered acceptable to one degree or another. Also, sometimes homosexual couples of opposite genders will “beard” for each other in a mutually-beneficial dynamic.
edit: it seems spoiler text doesn’t work right on a lot of mobile apps, including voyager. Anyways: watch For All Mankind. It’s great.
I’m not sure they’re actually the same thing tho. Beards are used by gay men to seem straight. The term my mom used was against the women who just had a fetish for gay men.
Also, sometimes homosexual couples of opposite genders will “beard” for each other in a mutually-beneficial dynamic.
My parents had some friends who did exactly this for Prom since every attendee was required to have an opposite-sex date. They met the requirement to go through the front door then promptly split and found their actual date for the night (or their friend group if they were single)
