I’m not good with masking my emotions sometimes, although I do try to process the things before I take any action.
My face and body language on the other hand can reflect what I’m going through at the moment.
Are you aware of any ways to control yourself under difficult situations (apart from things like meditation) ?
I’ve had depression for years. You get good at pretending to be happy/ok and you mostly just become numb and very good at hiding things on the outside.
Same!
I’m nonbinary and spent the last 25-ish years suppressing my feelings in order to blend in at school and work. One ends up getting very good at masking themselves, wearing a “Resting Neutral Face” so often that it becomes a reflexive defense mechanism.
I finally escaped Texas a couple of years back and got started on hormone therapy, which has been amazing. My friends and relatives have all commented on how much happier I seem now, but I haven’t been able to drop the mask entirely as of yet. I still have a hard time showing negative emotions. After hiding them for so long, anger and sadness are wired in like a PTSD trigger that numbs my expression before anything more than concern can show.
I suppose it isn’t all that bad, having an involuntary poker face can be an advantage in social deduction games. Not even my partners can tell when I’m the imposter in Among Us. XD
I can’t speak for everyone but I’ve spent my entire life masking my depression so I’ve gotten pretty good at masking in general. It’s just practice.
some learn it in order to survive. others learn it to control situations - you can control how you react to things, which disarms lots of aggression/bullying. its even stronger to not actually get sad or angry when its justifiable, as cooler heads more often prevail. to wear your heart on your sleeve is a luxury afforded to the safe people.
I disagree that it’s a luxury. Many people, especially autistic people, simply cannot learn this skill and they can suffer for it greatly.
i get your perspective and thank you for sharing. i posit that if their circumstances are traumatizing enough, those many people would reroute their brains to compartmentalize. its a luxury that they hadn’t had to. it’s not a ‘skill’ that is “learned” in a typical fashion. theres no school book for it.
Practice probably will help. If you can find a mirror while you’re in such a state, you could practice controlling your facial expressions in front of it.
That said, expressing emotion isn’t inherently bad, though I understand there may be some situations in which you don’t want to.
Wasnt allowed to be sad as a kid, can’t even try to show it on my face. Not showing it is the standard.
