60 points

When dealing with your stomach its better to treat it like a 5 year old.

“I’m hungry!”

“Okay lets get you some food”

“I want chocolate cake and ice cream!”

“you can have some ice cream, but only after you eat your vegetables”

“I don’t want vegetables! Now I want Pizza!”

“When you eat nothing but cake, ice cream, and pizza you feel really bad. Here’s a steak, some rice, and steamed broccoli”

“FINE!..but I still want the ice cream afterward”

“You cleared the plate! Would you like some ice cream now?”

“No, I don’t want ice cream now. I want to take a nap”

permalink
report
reply
6 points

It’s over when the Brain and Stomach team up to override you and you end up eating pizza and ice cream anyway.

permalink
report
parent
reply
1 point

To me thats more of: Brain stepped on a Lego and tripped smacking into the counter edge and is knocked out cold. Now Stomach is running wild and unchecked and pizza and ice cream in excess is consumed by Stomach. Brain wakes up sometime later to deal with the fallout and admonishes Stomach about the bad behavior and makes it promise to never do that again.

permalink
report
parent
reply
14 points

Why is there smoke coming out of your oven, Seymour?

permalink
report
reply
9 points

Aurora Borealis?

permalink
report
parent
reply
7 points

At this time of year? At this time of day? In this part of the country? Localized entirely within your kitchen?

permalink
report
parent
reply
13 points

Pain is googling “instant heartburn relief” at 3 am. “Have you tried going back in time to eat less garbage?” as well as the suggestion to literally drink acid (apple cider vinegar).

permalink
report
reply
5 points

Fuck. Suffered through life for years before getting a solid prescription for Omeprazole. Life changing.

Waking up at 3am breathing fucking fire because my stomach pushed up some of the worst acid is a hell of a thing to try and start understanding when you’re not even awake enough to understand what’s going on

permalink
report
parent
reply
7 points

Its shitpost not shit post

permalink
report
reply
7 points

You’re a shit post

permalink
report
parent
reply
3 points

No u

permalink
report
parent
reply
7 points

Suddenly Seymour

permalink
report
reply
3 points

🎵Standing beside you🎵

permalink
report
parent
reply
3 points

You don’t need no makeup

permalink
report
parent
reply

Lemmy Shitpost

!lemmyshitpost@lemmy.world

Create post

Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful

Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.


2. No Illegal Content

Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)


3. No Spam

Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers

-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.


4. No Porn/Explicit

Content


-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.


5. No Enciting Harassment,

Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts


-Do not Brigade other Communities

-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.

-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.

-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.


6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.

If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


Also check out:

Partnered Communities:

1.Memes

2.Lemmy Review

3.Mildly Infuriating

4.Lemmy Be Wholesome

5.No Stupid Questions

6.You Should Know

7.Comedy Heaven

8.Credible Defense

9.Ten Forward

10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)


Reach out to

All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker

Community stats

  • 14K

    Monthly active users

  • 11K

    Posts

  • 242K

    Comments