Trying to keep my very picky eater 3yo healthy as we’re (hopefully) expanding his diet. Right now the only foods I can get him to actually eat are McDonald’s, a specific brand of yogurt, banana bread, some crackers and some bars. Refuses any beverage besides water. (He’s likely on the spectrum.)

23 points
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Flinstone vitamins, maybe? Or any other kids gummy vitamins.

I would highly recommend talking with a child therapist before this becomes an ingrained habit, if you haven’t already.

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14 points

It’s also worth getting them checked out by a gastroenterologist. Sometimes picky eating is a subconscious thing to avoid having the shits all the time.

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11 points

I’m not trying to downplay the reality of serious health concerns sometimes being behind food habits, but I think I need to say…

Picky eating is an absolutely normal part of child development. Anecdotally, both of my kids went through two distinct phases of picky eating, at around 3-5 and 8-11.

They gradually grow out of it. All you can do is try to make sure what they are eating is nutritious enough while they are going through it.

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2 points

that’s a good point, too.

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7 points

Yes, that may be the answer. He’s getting help through early intervention and on the waitlist to get tested for autism so see if that’s what’s causing his picky eating. Luckily his pediatrician is not urgently concerned about his diet because he’s growing well enough and seems healthy, but since I’ve stopped breastfeeding I’ve been keeping track of what foods he’s been eating and noticed how few vitamins are in all the things he’ll eat.

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5 points

Op, I agree with getting some gastric testing, if possible. I may or not be divergent, testing is cost prohibitive. But I was diagnosed as a child with IBS and still have occasional issues after food poisoning set backs a while ago. After getting that straightened out, a decent probiotic cap with fiber set me back on track until I could eat a mostly veggie diet, until the robber Barron corporate overlords started pricing decent food so crazily. You can add nutrition to crackers or bread with nut butters if your toddler will have them. If toddler requires more sweetness, try adding as little maple syrup as possible, and honey if his practitioner deems it ok.

Have you tried home made sweet potato fries (oven baked or air fry is fine, you’d have to look up how to oven fry them), or if your child will eat baked sweet potatoe with a little real butter they are highly nutritious and gut friendly. It’s just hard to say because one of the many reasons I may be asd is it doesn’t matter how much I like the flavor of something, if I don’t like the feel or consistency of a food, I’m simply not having it.

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6 points
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3 points

do… I want to know what “rough” means?

hope they’re just nasty-tasting.

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8 points
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22 points
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I know you’ve thought of this, but encouraging you to try again. Ive found that kids will refuse something to eat and then come back to it later when they are actually hungry.
It may take a tantrum and crazy cry session, but with love and attention they can normalize and get back towards a more normal diet.
I get that kids have certain things they don’t like, but for anyone whose kids only eat things that are deep fry brown, I think it’s worth the short-term crisis to solve the long-term aggravation and health issues. Edit: ok yeah I missed the potential autism part of question. Encourage other parents to stay strong with eating habits if that is not the case

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5 points

That’s not how autistic disordered eating works.

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1 point

It may be spartan, but giving them a regular plate of homecooked dinner (with vegetables of course) and nothing else until they’ve finshed it, works most of the time. If not, they go to bed hungry which doesn’t hurt them (it hurts your sleep though) if it doesn’t happen every day. Like you said, they’ll likely come around, but you have to out-patience them.

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1 point

So, abuse the autistic child…

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3 points

No, I guess I should’ve mentioned to not abuse your child this way. Just like a microwave manual mentions that you should not put your cat in a microwave.

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19 points

Freeze dried fruit. It makes fruit taste and crunch more like candy. My nephew goes crazy for freeze dried fruit. Blueberries, figs, mango, there’s so many to try

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2 points

Yes! Also dates are great and last for a while on the shelf. They’re super sweet. Also raisins or trail mix. You can even make granola bars very easily with quick oats, peanut butter, honey or maple syrup, and trail mix. Sprinkle on a bit of salt for extra addictive.

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18 points
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While I’m autistic and have my own issues with food, we’re all different and have our own lists of “safe” and “unsafe” foods, so I don’t have any specific advice other than please, please don’t listen to the people who want you to abuse your child by either forcing, or withholding food.

Post this in an autistic group if you want to hear how well that actually works (that’s actually the best advice I can give in general - follow autistic people and spaces, listen to autistic adults who have been there and know what your child is going through, and, often with the opposite intent, the damage their parent or guardian or doctor or “therapist” did to their mental and general health and wellbeing because they were treated as “poorly behaved” neurotypicals, instead of the neurodiverse individuals that they (we) are).

E: even if it turns out they aren’t autistic, forcing and/or withholding food is still just as shitty a thing to do.

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4 points

Seconding this plea to ignore anyone telling you to force or withhold food. The whole “they’ll eat it when they’re hungry enough” may apply to many picky eaters, but if someone (kid or adult) eats an extremely limited or unusual diet like you’re describing in the comments, there is a good chance it may be ARFID. It’s an eating/feeding disorder that often goes along with autism or sensory processing disorders, but can be separate. Critically, the “tried and true” parenting strategies for breaking picky eaters will exacerbate the problem. Of course the answer also isn’t “let them eat McDonald’s all day and stop worrying,” but there are a lot of strategies for supporting someone (especially kids) to expand their list of safe foods in a low-risk high-reward way.

Like the commenter above me said, everyone who has/had ”issues with food” is going to have an entirely different list of what they can and can’t eat and a different set of strategies that worked or backfired for them. The only general advice I have that I think applies across the board is: lower the pressure. If someone only eats 2 or 5 or 10 things, every interaction with food is already very high stakes and takes up a lot of brain space. You’re probably not going to be able to make specific foods less scary, but you can make the environment safer. Never make an unsafe food the only option, don’t let them see how worried you are, don’t (like my mom did) tell them “scientists found that if you eat more than one hot dog a month you get cancer” or “if you don’t eat vegetables you’ll die before you turn 20.” And maybe counterintuitively, don’t act overly surprised or excited when they are curious about a new food, aren’t afraid of something, like a food now that they insisted they didn’t like, etc. Just go with it as a win for you both. Let them see that what happens when they can eat more food is just…they can eat more food. No drama. (Exception if they are already excited and you are following their lead.)

Resources like NEDA (in the like above) can point you toward some places to start and connect you with other parents and professionals who can offer more contextualized and specific advice. You might also look at the r/ARFID subreddit. It’s mostly adults supporting each other but there’s a lot of wisdom for concerned caregivers and loved ones as well.

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1 point

Thank you! Yes, ARFID has been on my radar since learning one of my friends has it and I’m curious if my son has it as well. I’ve definitely been guilty of not hiding my excitement when he tries a new food, so that’s a helpful note.

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3 points

Yes I agree with all of this!

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2 points

+1 for talking to autistic adults. There’s no better source of information on what works and doesn’t work in autism.

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15 points
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10 points

Not with real food, but I have saved the mcnuggets box and tried giving him other kinds of chicken nuggets. He nibbled on a couple and then made a look like “well this whole batch is messed up.”

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4 points
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4 points

Muwahahahaha.

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