A Catholic priest in England was reported by his parishioners after he allegedly told them Jesus died with an erection. The Times of London reports that the diocese of Hexham & Newcastle investigated the complaint against Father Thomas McHale—an American assigned to Our Blessed Lady Immaculate in Blackhill for a decade—and it was “upheld.” While McHale was reprimanded, he has not lost his position as a result of the Good Friday sermon that some of his flock deemed vulgar. McHale is said to have told those in the pews that when Jesus was crucified, blood would have rushed to his lower body. “He told people Jesus died with an erection,” one church-goer told the Times. “The church was shocked. There were young families there.” McHale is hardly the first to discuss the possibility that Jesus’ asphyxiation could have caused an erection, and the possibility has even been suggested in art through the years.
There was another man who was persecuted for speaking the truth.
Yo this priest is 100% into stranglebaitin
And lo he gave it a tug and found it was good.
And if it worked for Jesus, why not give it a go? Thought Michael Hutchence and David Carradine just before their deaths.
Today’s lesson is: just because Jesus invented autoerotic asphyxiation doesn’t mean you have to try it yourself.
Here endeth the sermon.
“Father, into your hands I commend my spirit, but by God is my cock hard and my balls blue.”
If anyone would have angel lust, it’d probably be the guy who knew them best. Jesus was into wheels and eyes, apparently.
Jesus was into wheels […], apparently.
Jesus built my car. It’s a love affair, mainly Jesus and my hot rod.
Jesus was really hung up there, huh?