Online dating is so shit for the majority of hetero dudes. You’re lucky if you match with somebody, luckier if you get to have some kind of discussion that doesn’t end after a few messages, even luckier if it ends in a date, amazingly lucky if anything physical happens, and incredibly lucky if it turns into a relationship.
Men are expected to initiate, keep the discussion alive, ask out, keep the woman entertained, and be grateful they were chosen. It only gets worse online.
this power imbalance is bad for everyone as well, if you meet up with someone via these (if are not male presenting), there is a concerningly high chance that you get sexually assaulted, I am terrified how common this seems to be among the women I’ve talked to
How is this possible if 50% of the couples meet online? Are you in the US and using one of the major dating apps?
When you go to a friend’s bday party, try not approaching any women and not striking a conversation. How many times will you be approached. Report us your results.
That’s how I found out I might be a little attractive. Lots of stories about apps being ghost towns and it being hard to talk to people. I didn’t struggle much to talk to people, went on dates and found my now fiancee that way.
You’re one of the lucky few. I bet online apps are great for attractive dudes with lots of great pictures lol.
This is partly because the apps suck (because of capitalism/profit motive) and partly because we all suck.
Many people of all genders won’t do better than “hey”. And then complain that they’re not having good experiences. Sometimes it’s garbage in, garbage out, my dudes.
I also get a lot of weird dead ends. Their profile will be like “I love elden ring”. You’ll be like “elden ring is a masterpiece! Did you play the new expansion yet?” They’ll be like “no”. End of messages. My dude. That’s not how this works. In real life, fine, maybe you can give a short answer and see what they do, read some body language. But in an asynchronous text only communication? That’s not pulling your weight. And if you’re not actually interested, just unmatch. If you don’t have time , don’t reply at all. It’s async. Come back later.
Maybe some of these people match with each other and are very happy with “what’s up?” “nm u?” “Im good” forever.
Thanks to Tinder I had the best and the worst first dates in my life.
But both long term girlfriends and soon-to-be-my-wife I met through friends
This ends at 2020. During the pandemic lockdown.
Of course meeting online went up if every bar and restaurant was closed and half the workforce suddenly was work from home or just not working.
people have no friends anymore
And due to urban sprawl, everyone gets into their car in their garage, drives to work, then drives back to their garage. There’s no room for walking to the neighborhood pub, convenience store, pharmacy, etc and bumping into neighbors on the way.
That’s interesting. I wonder whether those 6519 surveyed are representative of whole population, or of people who anyway online a lot. It’s seems there was an inflection around 2012 - what happened then ? The curve ends during covid lockdowns, wonder whether deflected since ?
There was an almost overnight shift from “ewww, online people are weird strangers” to “the Internet is just digital real life”. For years it was the first, and then as mainstream popularity hit, it was like a switch flipped and suddenly the Internet was “cool” and just like comics and superheros, everyone acted like they were a fan all along.
It was kinda jarring tbh. All the things that got you labeled a nerd and a geek(negatively) were suddenly good things. I think it mostly had to do with the tech surge and people seeing it as a valuable thing now.
Based on the one class I took in college about surveys and mass comm I’d say that’s a good sample size (assuming they were chosen at random). Most political polls survey about 1500 people with 90%+ accuracy
But how, practically, do you choose any sample “at random” nowadays ?
Especially if trying to avoid a bias towards (or away from) online people ?
This belongs in boringdystopia.