OldEggNewTricks
Ex-egg. Turns out wishing you were a girl does work.
I always used to think that moisturizer was kind of a scam. I’m sorry, and I take it all back.
My skin is turning into tissue paper! (And looking niiice <3) It’s soaking up pretty much anything I can throw at it. Now if I can just grow my hair a bit longer and shed those last 15kg or so…
Oh! Is that what it is?
I’ve been using my “girl voice” all the time now, and while I might be said to present somewhat androgynous, I’m perhaps not obviously trying to appear feminine. BUT, when I talk to people, they (particularly men) have started responding in much softer tones after they hear my voice. I thought they might just be imitating me, but could it be their “talking to women” voice? I hope so :3
This, for real though. You can often tell you’ve made it when people stop treating you specially.
By way of analogy: I live in a non-English-speaking part of the world, and was very self-conscious about my language ability. To begin with, everyone told me “you speak very well” (with an implied “for a foreigner”), but after a lot of practice that finally gave way to a curt “that’s wrong” whenever I slipped up. Now people generally assume I was born here to immigrant parents.
Gender-wise (although I’m nowhere near female-passing yet), I guess things like double-takes in bathrooms, or people being “gentlemanly” are good things to look out for?
Blåhaj is always up for a cuddle.
Oh hello, are you me?
I’ve been watching Elena Darlingg recently, and got a bad case of “wow, she’s amazing. I’m never going to be as much of a woman as her. I’m not really trans anyway…” etc etc.
Mostly I just recognize this as an unhelpful thought pattern and go do something else for a while (and cuddle Blåhaj). Objectively, I know that these are thoughts that cis women have; it’s just imposter syndrome; I should be comparing progress against my past self and so on, but that really doesn’t help much when I’m feeling jealous.
Sometimes I do get euphoria though, and while I can’t call it up on demand, I do try to remember those times and that I’m doing this to feel good!
Starting HRT made a big difference: I’m in the pipeline now and just sitting around is still working towards my goal. I hope your therapist will get you sorted soon.
<3
I just switched. It’s so nice cutting out the application and drying time twice a day. I was expecting the oily depot injection to be painful, but it wasn’t at all. Not sure what fluctuating hormone levels is going to be like, but at least I have gel as a backup.
My doctor doesn’t offer self injections, but I’d like to start at some point, especially once we’ve got the dose figured out.