I was obsessed with Long John Silver as a child, but I think I might enjoy the character of Captain Ahab more nowadays. I guess I have a thing for flawed maritime literary characters

All I hear is the shit in your mouth from all the boots you’ve licked

Batman and Robin.

Recently I have been reading a lot of folklore from eastern Europe. I find it all fascinating since it doesn’t get told as much where I am from as things like Greek mythology.

This is gonna be a deeply unpopular opinion but the Legend of Zelda Ocarina of Time is my least favorite game I ever played. I like rogs but never owned a nintendo and my friend was always raving about it so I finally played it a few years back and I just hated it. The gameplay didn’t feel good which I expected given it was still the wild west of 3d graphics but the thing that really annoyed me was how much sitting and waiting you had to do. All enemies are just sit, wait, dodge, hit in the right spot, repeat. Plus everyone wants to talk to you to tell you everything about the gameplay instead of just letting you figure it out. I found the whole experience frustrating.

Your business is licking shit off boots

Go lick some boots

I have a lot of experience reconstructing whale skeletons for museums and such. I do it as a hobby with a friend of mine who is the marine mammals recovery coordinator for the state of North Carolina.

I teach outdoors for school groups in a nature area and a part of that process is a discovery hike. Its me, about 12 kids, and a parent chaperone and as we are walking through the woods we see a deer. All these kids, who were in 4th grade, were so excited! We very quietly watched it grazing around in this woods, not giving us any mind at all, when it sort of gets its antlers tangled in some vine and ends up pulling a dead tree down on top of it.

The deer is now flailing under a whole ass tree that collapsed right on to it, and it clearly is suffering. It is making the worst kinds of noises and I have the parent keep the kids back as I approach this crazed stag. It clearly suffered head trauma and was bleeding. The worst part is that it was right on the path back and, due to the terrain, there was really no way to get around this deer without being close to it. After trying and failing to get the deer loose, I had the children all vlimb over the tree and we went back. To top it off they all immediately got on the bus to go home, so it was the last memory these kids had of the place.

I ended up going back and putting the deer down. Absolutely traumatizing.

At least book gandalf just growled it. A growl to me is a lot quieter than what movie gandalf did