Share some activities youâve been interested in doing but couldnât do because youâre closeted.
Transmasc, Transfem, Nonbinary, and Gender Non-Conforming answers are all welcome and encouraged here.
Thatâs about right.
Itâs funny how I held on and didnât transition for other people, but when I transitioned pretty much nobody cared that much. Transition felt impossible and so selfish before transitioning, yet on other side it seems like it was self-destructive to not transition and trivial compared to how difficult I thought it was going to be. (Though transition is difficult, donât let me mislead - itâs just not nearly as bad as I thought it would be, and there are so many things that went better than I thought.)
I guess this is just a lesson in how easy it is to rationalize and build up your fears, and how you are your own biggest barrier.
I currently have a similar thought proccesss to how you described yours.
Transitioning feels like this super selfish thing, where many of my friends and family will just not accept it, and where I drag people more down than I help myself.
Unfortunately I have not convinced myself to another point of view yet.
People who would get âdragged downâ by someone they know transitioning are doing it to themselves. There is no logic in laying the blame on the person transitioning.
It costs nothing to be kind and supportive to those around you, so I would consider those who wonât even do that, to be the selfish ones.
If a person struggles with someone they know transitioning, good, because maybe that finally provokes the introspection in them, required to become a better person.
If it doesnât, I donât know how to help them.
But I know how to help you. Transitioning is not selfish. Itâs life-saving.
Yes, in my experience the only people in your life who really struggle are people who have their own issues (i.e. it never actually seems to be about you or your transition exactly) e.g. people who are closeted and who experience pain when reminded of their issues when they see you.
Usually even a bigoted religious person isnât directly mean to you, it seems like the Christians generally reiterate how much they love you and so on (but they donât want to talk too much about gender). In fact, I donât find anyone wanting to talk about gender IRL, lol. Anyway, itâs hard to tell how it will go - I think itâs also different if youâre a minor living at your parentsâ house compared to an independent adult. It also depends on who is in your life, and how they felt about you before you transitioned.
Either way, transitioning is like taking medication as a diabetic or someone with hypothyroidism - it really is life-saving and necessary.
To be fair, I never convinced myself of the other view point, even now I think transitioning is âselfishâ in a sense, itâs just that on the other side I can confirm it wasnât like I thought it would be and that there was also something âselfishâ about never taking care of myself and being a burden on others because of that.
I think itâs OK to be selfish, so long as that means prioritizing self-interest over that of others, rather than being greedy at othersâ expense. And transitioning does not cost anybody else anything: you donât owe it to anyone to be anything other than yourself.
After all, nobody is going to look out for your well-being as diligently as you yourself.
![eggđ”irl [Gender Non-specific] [Q&A Post](lemmy.blahaj.zone)](https://lemmy.blahaj.zone/pictrs/image/0b23aa1d-9e18-43e5-9f70-c4b39eb57b4b.webp){kind=link}