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24 points
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GPS, music, and I disagree about the camera. I’d love a dumb phone that could do GPS music and a camera and nothing else besides text and calls.

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2 points

Ehh… I hate anal-locked phones. They are turing machines. They are mathematically proven to be as capable as any other turing machines.

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17 points

anal-locked

new kind of biometrics?

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3 points

Or anal-guarded. Yes. Translation of анально-огороженные.

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9 points

Insert authentication dildo to continue.

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11 points

The flashlight to.

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2 points
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The flashlight to where?

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4 points

And authenticators, password managers.

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