I didn’t intend to be dismissive and if my response sounded that way then I apologise.
I agree it’s difficult to be on the receiving end of vague signals, but my perspective is if there’s any annoyance or frustration it should be directed at the violent/angry men who have caused women to feel unsafe.
Helping women feel safer by tackling the violence and misogyny directed at them by men will benefit everyone.
The main thing for me is to remember it’s not personal. When a stranger treats me as a potential threat, it is not an insult to my character.
Being treated as a threat by someone who knows my character, is an insult to my character.
But when a stranger models me as a stranger, it’s not personal at all. It’s not about me. Not a reflection of who I am.