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64 points

It appears the market has spoken, thus you must clearly upgrade your ring cutting equipment.

That is, unless the poor sap acquired the titanium ring from Boeing or Airbus’ supplier. Then maybe you can use kindergarten stubby scissors.

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46 points

Hospitals will generally have ring cutters like this:

They are hand powered and very cost effective for gold and silver rings. Diamond tipped cutters usually need something like a Dremel to power them. They look something like this:

.

They are much more expensive compared to hand powered ones, and pose a higher risk to a patient so they would require additional training to use it, which is another extra cost.

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58 points

Also, ummm, titanium gets hot. Like all metal gets hot when you cut it, that’s just how friction works.

But titanium is gummy.

When we cut steel it makes a nice clean chip until the tool is dull, then it’ll make ugly chips.

When we cut aluminum or copper, we have to use tools with fewer teeth so they don’t get clogged up with chips. This is fine because these materials are so soft and we can run cutting speeds so high that having fewer teeth isn’t a big deal.

But titanium is both gummy, in that it wants lots of space between cuts because it’ll clog up teeth, and very hard, in that it wants lots of teeth making smaller cuts.

It’s also a shit conductor. Aluminum and copper will whisk away heat. Titanium gets hot and stays that way.

So your titanium jewelry, wherever applied, that needs to be cut off of you, will need a diamond saw, which isn’t really a cutting tool, it’s an abrasive one. Meaning it works through aggressive, point blank friction.

My point is if you smash your titanium cock ring on, it’s going to not only require a very uncomfortable proximity to a power tool to remove it, it’s going to absolutely burn the fuck out of your dick.

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17 points

Fascinating! However, the fire department (or whoever is your local IDR unit) will almost certainly run coolant while cutting a ring off of anyone.

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10 points

Thank you for the details! I find the different properties of metals fascinating but rarely have the time to read up on it (which isn’t made easier by having to first read up on and understand a bunch of terminology and underlying concepts, which my ADHD just doesn’t have the patience for), so comments like yours giving a bit of insight are perfect.

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3 points

Gold cock ring it is!

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25 points

Just want to add that we’re talking about a tool that can be used to remove rings stuck on any appendage, not just cocks.

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6 points

Yes! I should have clarified. Wedding rings getting stuck on old people’s fingers will be the main use case for those tools, meaning people will have to buy a lot of titanium cock rings before it’s cost effective for hospitals to have electric cutting tools as standard.

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3 points

You know, it seems Boeing managed to become less reliable than Ilyushin.

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