I’m picking “Colonel” needs to be respelled to match how it’s pronounced.

Try to pick a word no one else has picked. What word are you respelling?

74 points

In this thread, a lot of folks who would use their one wish to make the language better.

But I would change “their” to be spelled “the’re” and pronounced “all’y’all’s”.

I hope I do grow up to be more like the rest of you, and make better choices, in the future.

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46 points
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People like you being in charge is how English got to this position in the first place!

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18 points

Your rite, and I regret my choices.

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twitch

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2 points

I would expect nothing less, MajorHavoc 🫡

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61 points

Nesscary

…Neccisary

…Neseccary

Fuck it, it’s now “Nesisary”

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15 points

“Needed”

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11 points

Do the needful.

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2 points

Required

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7 points

English is a second language to me, and at this point it’s probably the only commonly used word I consistently mess up. It usually ends up something like ‘nessecairy’

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Totally understandable, one of a handful of English words that I both know are spelled “wrongL and also have to put conscious thought into spelling before I write it.

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Ironicly, “conshus” one such candidate for me.

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5 points

Can never remember how to spell this absolute fuckery of a word. I concur.

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1 point

That’s so weird. I’m dyslexic and all but this word is very much common sense for me. Maybe because I’m a polyglot and in Italian it’s necessario?

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1 point

English is my second language, but I’ve always remembered it by “one cardigan, two socks” necessary

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3 points

Necessary is literally spelt how it’s pronounced though.

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2 points
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spelt how it’s pronounced though

I’m not sure you meant this as a joke but it is funny.

Learning yet another irregular pronunciation because some N-hundred years ago their majesty Shithead von Cunt wanted to sound fancy and everyone just played along is not funny.

cries, not knowing how to properly pronounce most English words

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3 points

That’s a bit unesesary

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2 points

Necessary? I would have never thought of any of those weird spellings. It’s spelled like it’s said lol.

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wait was it nesisary or nesusary.

nesesary? nesasary? nesysary?

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1 point

Nesree

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29 points

English orthography is awful. Hard “c” AND soft “c”? Are you crazy? How about that “k” that is already the hard c sound? It should be “kat” and “kar”. And it only goes downhill from there (or their?!?).

We should clean it up someday. But we’ll probably end up with LOL-WTF-speak.

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8 points

Some of the low hanging fruit would just be to pick one pronunciation of “oo” and stick with it:

  • book
  • blood
  • floor
  • brooch
  • boot

The problem is that English has far more vowel sounds than vowels. And that’s without even having certain sounds that are common in other languages like “ü”.

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10 points

Linguistics would teach that it is the orthography that is flawed. The English language has many vowel sounds, more than most languages. But as you demonstrate, the orthography “lumps” many of them together. Which, again, is why I think English orthography is awful.

There’s a great article at Wikipedia, scroll down to the “Vowels” section: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/English_phonology

There’s a link the the article above to this page, which I don’t suggest viewing on your phone. It has a great effort to document vowels across dialects of English, scroll down again to the huge table: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/International_Phonetic_Alphabet_chart_for_English_dialects

Be careful, the linguistics “rabbit hole” is deep (but fascinating)!

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2 points

Thanks, I really like the IPA and I wish it were something that was taught in high school. It would be great if people were competent at reading it and could maybe use it to explain how something sounds. It’s hard enough that English has such flawed orthography. Then you add the fact that there are dozens of English dialects and it only makes things more complicated.

Do you know about Dr. Geoff Lindsey’s YouTube channel?

https://www.youtube.com/@DrGeoffLindsey

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5 points

It’s not all bad. The varied spellings of English help with visual pattern recognition and increased reading speed.

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2 points

That must have already happened and we got the Geordie accent from it!

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28 points

Macabre. Why do you need two silent letters?

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36 points
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Deleted by creator
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26 points

Blame the French.

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6 points

Please wait in the queue with four unpronounced letters

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2 points

I always pronounce this “quayway”

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1 point
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What you spelled there would be pronounced key-way haha

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4 points
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British English voices those letters in most accents. I think the two silent letters is just a North American thing.

Similar to herb.

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2 points

Not saying you’re wrong at all, it’s not exactly a common word to hear said out loud. But I’ve never heard anyone do this and the very idea of it blows my mind.

(NE England, here)

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2 points
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The last syllable is usually pretty subtle, like the br- in bread, but very quietly voiced. I’d say I hear it maybe 75% of the time I hear the word. Currently in Yorkshire, via SW England, London and NW England. The syllable is a lot less subtle in a West Yorks accent!

Did you learn French at GCSE level? Possibly there’s a relationship between that and pronouncing the re like that in French-derived words. Cadre is another example. If it is related to learning French, then it’s probably on the decline as French teaching is on the decline and foreign languages are no longer compulsory at GCSE.

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1 point

Why use a French word then?

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2 points

Ma-carb, much better

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2 points

“queue”, 4/5 letters are silent.

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1 point

Wait how is that pronounced? I’ve always read it as Mah-Ca-Burr. It’s one of these words I learned through text exposure rather than English classes…

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28 points

Comfterble

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7 points

Kumfirtubble

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4 points

But saying “com-fidi-ble” is so much more fun

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