Donald J. Trump plans to hold a “general news conference” on Thursday afternoon at his private club and home, Mar-a-Lago, the first such event he has held in months.

Mr. Trump announced the event on his website, Truth Social, on Thursday morning.

91 points

It would be hilarious if he was dumping Vance from the ticket, but I have a hunch this will be something racist - maybe he’s going to accuse Kamala of not being American and we’re going to have to deal with a whole Birtherism 2.0 “movement”

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26 points

we’re going to have to deal with a whole Birtherism 2.0 “movement”

AKA BM 2.0

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17 points

Oh, shit…

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9 points

Not Number Two.

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13 points

I suspect he’s dropping out on some pretense, now that the campaign stopped being fun. If there is any chance in hell he could get a deal to get his sentence(s) commuted, I think he’d do it in a heartbeat.

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67 points

His dropping out seems very unlikely. Not impossible by any means, but unlikely. He doesn’t seem like the person who’s capable of admitting defeat, especially considering his legal troubles

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11 points

I agree, and I think we’re working from the same priors. I just have a funny little hunch.

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7 points

I think if Trump was projected to lose by an embarrassing margin - I’m talking like 75-25 - he might prefer trying to weasel out of having a legitimate devastating loss on official record. That’s not happening though with how big his base is, and with the electoral college being the way it is he is still probably favoured to win - though yes the polls are slipping.

Regardless, I can’t see him dropping out now.

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11 points

He is still in quite a bit of legal jeopardy. I highly doubt he would drop out knowing that some lawsuits have only been held at bay due to the position of power a presidential candidate and the godhead of a cult has.

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4 points

Not that I believe this is the case AT ALL, but to further this line of thought:

If he was dropping out, it would be because he’s already got the party machine going on a new (guaranteed) nominee who would have already promised to pardon trump (and this promise would be assured by some damning fact trump could use as an assurance)

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8 points

He won’t. The only reason he is running this time is to stay out of jail though I think.

If he drops out, I guarantee he’s going to be doing a runner shortly after.

It’s more likely he’ll use this event to set up things for a civil war

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2 points

I could easily see that. Right now the only thing I’m not expecting is for the next couple of months to be uneventful.

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5 points

0% chance. Narcissists cannot admit defeat.

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11 points

Can he dump Vance at the moment though? The RNC has already voted and he’s already been certified as the VP candidate.
I know Vance could step down and Trump could appoint a new VP, but I’m not sure that Trump has the ability to “fire” him.

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9 points

I know Vance could step down and Trump could appoint a new VP, but I’m not sure that Trump has the ability to “fire” him.

Trump would be the type to announce he’s firing Vance so he can be The Strong Man™ but it would in reality have to be Vance stepping down. It all works out to be the same result though.

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3 points
*

I’m not sure that Trump has the ability to “fire” him.

That’s never stopped him before

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60 points
*

I’m sure it’ll be tactful, thought-provoking, revealing, humorous, witty, intelligent, factual, and memorized word-for-word to be recited ala Churchill, JFK, MLK et al for centuries to come.

PS - 'shrooms for sale! DM for info.

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6 points

No lies even!

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51 points

Prediction: he’s going to announce he’s selling golden Trump brand dildos so everyone can go fuck themselves.

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12 points

“golden” dildos, at $1000. But if you opt for the “I’ve always supported you, and believe all your lies” version for $100,000 you can get the ultra special trump bucks dildo, modeled off your savior trump’s dick itself*. (*Note: all special versions are the same as the regular, any and all payments are recurring subscriptions and cannot be cancelled except in person)

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6 points

Why is mine tarnishing? Is this even real gold?

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2 points

It’s crusted with diamond dust!

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4 points

Golden couches.

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4 points

With a special pocket for glove and lube storage.

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3 points

Not too many comments actually make me laugh out loud, thanks for the laugh!

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2 points

Nah, with J.ust D.umb Vance now on board, it’ll probably be a new “Freedom Couch” sold exclusively at Bob’s Discount Furniture.

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47 points

“Why aren’t you all paying attention to me anymore?”

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9 points

Realistically, no matter what the topic is, this is the core problem.

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7 points

My diaper’s full and I need changing! 🧷

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7 points

Harris should hold a town hall at the exact same time…

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27 points

Is it to claim that he has really important news about Kamala’s birth certificate and he’ll be sharing it at a later date?

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9 points

But what about the long form birth certificate? /s

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3 points

It’s not October yet

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