There’s now a small chance that the next shooting is some singularity-craving bazinga with a greeble-laden AR-15 that believes they can’t get domed by the Secret Service because they believe in “quantum immortality” and will immediately teleport to a reality where they weren’t domed by the Secret Service.

54 points

Critical support for this proposal, that said.

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46 points
*

Former President Donald J. Trump, 78, Reduced to Ashes After Becoming Trapped in Burning Golf Cart

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He died as he lived

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He still loves the cart though

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10 points

Zybertrukkks aren’t even waterproof, good luck with that.

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Instead of being Bullet proof it’ll actually attract the bullets using a giant magnet

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51 points

Pro-forced impregnation and pro-political assassination in a single week. Elon is channeling that Apartheid South Africa emerald mine energy.

Next, he’s going to start cutting off the arms of Twitter engineers who aren’t ensuring the promotion of Nazi content fast enough.

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38 points

Non-jokingly he might start talking about how “based” Leopold was.

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12 points

Absolutely zero chance Elon has any historical awareness beyond, “Napoleon and Caeser were alpha chad great men”.

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10 points

Nobody would actually do this. C’mon now.

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even if the many-worlds hypothesis was correct, there’s currently no reason to believe that your consciousness in this universe would be contiguous with your consciousness in any other ‘adjacent’ universes. quantum immortality is about as convincing as pascal’s wager lol. get better at epistemological nihilism tech-ghouls your unhinged assumptions are hilariously obvious.

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32 points

Of course it’s bullshit wishful thinking from bazingas afraid of death but wanting some of that religious escapism anyway.

For similar reasons they feverishly pretend that cyber-heaven awaits… and more clownishly, cyber-hell courtesy of “Rok0’s Bas!lisk” which is way scarier than old fashioned hell because there will be thousands, millions, billions, or maybe infinite perfect copies of the unworthy dead there, and because dae le copy is le exactly the same as the original person because hand-wavium reasons, it’s like suffering in hell thousands, millions, billions, or maybe infinite times over! I don’t know if that means all the perfect copies have telepathy with each other or whatever bullshit is at play, but they believe it, lol.

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I’m so fucking glad I don’t venture out of Hexbear anymore.

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10 points

“it’s impossible to experience not existing, therefore it’s impossible to experience being dead, therefore the you that is you will never die”

“it’s impossible to experience being dead, so your final moment will just be like falling into a black hole and never reaching it”

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This tweet would be suspension worthy before X times.

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30 points

That’s why borrowed so much Saudi blood money; he wanted to tweet cringe that badly.

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8 points

Back when I still had a crippling twitter addiction I did catch a suspension for tweeting like this.

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34 points
*

Very serious country that will continue to give subsidies and a lot of control of national interests to a non american that is inciting violence against their sitting president.

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