Ignoring the obvious joke, she doesn’t display any of Jesus’s qualities. Is she gentle, caring, and compassionate? Does she humbly serve the poor and the disadvantaged? Does she forgive her enemies and bless those who oppose her? Does she sacrifice for the benefit of others!?
I’m a Christian and while I don’t know for certain, I believe God knows the heart. But I don’t expect to see her in Heaven…
she doesn’t display any of Jesus’s qualities
Disagree.
She has long hair. Ok, not specified in the bible, but it’s canon at this point.
Also the episode of Jesus whoring at the theatre… Wait what is this bible?
For a moment I really thought there was something in the bible that could be seen as Jesus “whoring at the theater”
If US Christians are making it up as they go and seeing whatever they wanna see in the Bible, then I call upon you, my child, to announce your submission to the Parable of Jesus the Whore of the Theater and the Christ.
Seems like “Christianity” and “following Jesus’ teachings, words, and example” are completely at odds. I appreciate what you are saying. Why don’t we hear Jesus Followers calling out “Christians” more vocally and often? I’d expect more of a break in the church at this point, but it seems like a fairly united front to me even now.
Absolutely, they’re at-odds! Church attendance is down and people like me will now walk out if the pastor/leadership starts talking about following Trump. As for why that is, I don’t know. I think people have been following money and power rather than Jesus for a while now…
Oh common guys, that doesn’t have to be about oral sex and you know it.
It could just as well be about doggy style.
Wow. Way to circumvent my comment with a clever zip in the other direction. I love it.
She’s apparently equally strong while seated in a crowded movie theater.
This is the part that really got me. We’re all human and have our urges, no shame there. The average unknown Joe Schmoe knows to contain themselves in public - let alone a public figure with all eyes on them. What was the thought process?
The theater is dark, and she probably didn’t realize it had night vision cameras for security. Most people will also not have phones at hand, as its a rude act in a theater.
She really thought she could be an asshole because social pressure and darkness made it hard to prove she was an asshole after the fact. Its why she came out lying hard about vaping around pregnant women and somehow didn’t mention have her chest gropped and grabbing for dick around a bunch of people/kids.
She’s certainly good on her knees, but Jesus’ got nothing to do with it…
Shit like this makes me think she knows exactly what she’s doing, and she’s trying to position herself as the Sexy Nun archetype. She tries to be good but can’t help that the world sexualizes her against her will (wink). She would be ever so grateful to any strong, Christian men who might come to her aid and defend her honor from the lustful satanists.
She probably thinks, in all honesty, that the average person is too stupid to understand the innuendo, and that only the clever ones will get it, like it’s some exclusive inside joke.
Shit like this makes me think people don’t recognize fake tweets anymore.
