Sorry OP but this kinda gives “EPIC: WOKE FEMINAZI OWNED ON CAMERA” vibes.
Yeah… it can be interpreted that way. But even as a feminist myself, it is a dumb performative sort of protest. Paternal surnames are the least important fixtures of our patriarchal society, and, unless it was created wholecloth, there are no surnames that aren’t patriarchal historically, as the meme points out.
Yeah, I wasn’t trying to call you a misogynist, just point out how the meme might look at first glance.
If they think their actions are having much effect, sure, but otherwise I think you’re making assumptions and overreacting. Not everything is for show, people can do things like that just because they personally want to.
The context of the meme implied she was doing it because she’s a feminist and that taking her mother’s name was somehow an expression of that. Of course she can do that, but it isn’t achieving anything if that was the goal
That’s the point, but satirically. The fact that homelander is the second frame immediately means the take is bad.
Good point! But I also never saw it. Just know it from the comics and the news.
Also, the amount of people who don’t GET homeowner is scary…
It’s a shit post, I’ll give you that.
When people get married they should come up with a completely new last name for them both.
There’s even a website cataloguing them all! https://everyuuid.com/
A coworker of mine did this. He and his new wife took parts of their last names and blended them together to create a unique new last name for both of them.
A lot of last names here are frozen patronyms (e.g. at some point some dude named Hans had kids; now there are lots of people calling themselves his son, Hansen) or place names. I kinda like the place name bit: Just give kids last names to a place they have a connection to. Where they were born or conceived or something.
🎤 My name is chika-chika Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch
“London”: Not too bad, works ok.
“Climax”: …
“Tallahassee”: Pretty frickin’ awesome as a nickname but not sure formally.
“Syracuse”: I syr-acuse that of sounding dumb.
But regardless, besides all the “Von” or “De” or whatever names I’m willing to bet that modified or old spelling last names based on places are totally a thing that we also just decided to stop doing.
Yeah, like the -berg names (e.g. Stoltenberg), it’s likely the family farm if you go far enough back. My family has a name that’s an island and the settlement on it. Taking a profile picture next to the town sign that’s also our last name is pretty common (for a name of a few hundred people).
Conceived? You really want to be named after the motel your daddy did a big cummy in your mommy’s pussy?
Are you familiar with the Paris Hilton?
It’s tacky, but let’s be honest, that’s the least tacky thing about her.
Terrible idea. People clearly already struggling at naming kids. Coming up with a family name will be endless letters making the wrong sound, random sections being ‘silent’, so many puns or references to things, corporate advertising “oh it’s the X.com family!”… Terrible, just terrible.
We could always do what Iceland does.
I’m sure that will scale up to much larger populations without issues.
My wife and I actually did this, sort of. Not a completely new name, but we took her grandmother’s name, rather than either of ours. Or, her great grandfather’s name, I suppose.
The only reason I wouldn’t want to take my partner’s name, or have the partner take mine, is the same reason I wouldn’t want to blend. It’s just a headache to make sure everything is changed. It’s why you see a lot of people who published research before their marriage continue to publish under the same name even if they changed their name. It’s a major hassle.
Sure it’s a headache. So why does the woman have to do it? I think either keep your names as is or both people change.
I think either keep your names as is
Uh… that was exactly what I said…
So why does the woman have to do it?
And that was exactly what I was saying I wouldn’t do…
My wife was made fun of for her last name until she was like 25 (her social group sucked), so she was delighted to changed her name when I asked her if we were going to use mine or hers. I still don’t entirely mind changing mine or keeping it: I’d gotten a few public works built around town and one of them was named after me, and if I took her name the chances of getting them to change the name of that shelter were fuck all. You can only be the center of the universe for so long. So it just kind of worked out for both of us.
In Germany the current government had the idea (but never follow through on it) to allow a married couple to form a new last name based on their last names. Funnily enough the article mentions that this meshing of names is already possible and getting more popular in the USA and Great Britain.
Yeah, you can legally change your first and your last name to pretty much whatever you want as long as it isn’t deemed too offensive in both the U.S. and the UK.
https://listverse.com/2024/02/21/10-bizarre-legal-name-changes/
Big props to the kid who legally changed his name to Captain Fantastic Faster Than Superman Spiderman Batman Wolverine Hulk and The Flash Combined
No thanks. I don’t care what my hypothetical spouse wants to do with their last name but I’m not changing mine. Sounds like a pain in the ass.
I’m pretty sure only people on the internet argue about this. No one actually cares what other’s do with their last name after marriage.
This post has 2017 reddit vibes. Not in a good way either.
with no ill will for you, OP, genuinely fuck this boomer ass “joke”
a woman’s name is her name. she lives with it for 1 lifetime, absolutely no shorter than her grandfather does. “male” is not somehow the default human identity. stop trying to enforce that standard.
I think the point of the joke might be more that an attempt to start a matrilineal naming scheme is foiled somewhat from the fact that the maiden name of the mother is derived from her father, i.e. you can’t escape that the last names all come from patrilineal sources for generations.
If a woman is committed to the idea, she could break the patrilineal naming convention simply by creating herself a new last name, and encouraging her children to take that name instead of their father’s.
yes, though I think a naming system like this isn’t an individual act as much as occurs on the level of social norms and rules; a single individual won’t introduce a competing matrilineal naming system just by convincing her children into it…
Either way, I somewhat agree with the criticism of the joke that the last name coming from a patrilineal origin isn’t a gotcha, though maybe that’s actually the point of the meme since Homelander is the one posing it as a gotcha (and he’s a villain, so it would make sense to symbolize a misogynist with him). The name would still be inherited in a matrilineal way even if it started as a patrilineal name further up the chain.
I guess there is a question of whether the name’s origin matters at all when we are concerned with the patriarchial nature of a practice where women lose their family names and men don’t. That practice being disrupted is what matters, not what the actual name is.
This is true, but who decided that a woman keeping her maiden name is just using her father’s name? That idea comes from patriarchy. If I inherit something at birth, like a rare coin, it’s mine, whether it came from my mom or dad. The same goes for a woman’s name—it’s hers because she’s had it since birth. Suggesting she doesn’t own it, and must create a new name to escape, reinforces the idea that only patrilineal identity matters and undermines her autonomy in making that choice.
…yeah? exactly what i said? i don’t disagree at all except you possibly ignore that the butt of the joke is the woman, normalizing the very repression she attempts to subvert. it’s undermining and mocking the woman’s identity intentionally by asserting the dominance of patriarchal schemes over her own life and decision. (perhaps unintentionally, but nevertheless really.)
in America, historically Black names are also dominated by the history of slavery and white supremacy (different functions, but the end result: subjugation, is parallel). i would post a similar comment hating on a post mocking Black folk for resisting these patterns as well! :)
in my friend group we have a guy we describe as “default {name}”, in order to differentiate him from the other {name}s in the group. He’s a cisgender heterosexual white christian male (a rarity among us). Mostly it’s a joke, because we all agree that being mildly offensive is kinda funny, but it’s also a commentary on society at large. If you’re online talking to people you know nothing about, it’s a safe assumption (christian less and less as the years go by though).
It is absolutely ok to not be “default settings”. You’re not doing anything wrong by not confirming to that standard. I didn’t decide what default is, I learned it by observing society.
appreciate your insight! i fully agree with everything except perhaps:
You’re not doing anything wrong by not confirming to that standard.
still a correct statement on its own, but needs the clarification that it’s not chill to mock or hamper the efforts of that “Othered” community to subvert or reclaim their repression. while it’s certainly not wrong for a woman to conform to the patrilineal system, it’s not chill to “gotcha”-laugh at this woman for using the same name she and her mother have owned their whole lives.
it’s a very Rush Limbaugh-esque “you claim to he a feminist, yet you live under the forces and histories of the patriarchy, curious 🧐” joke, in that it’s not wrong, it’s just intensely and obviously comes from a place of ignorant disrespect.
Love the little respectful preamble you put there, can we make that internet discussion standard plz.?
