If both parties are 18 and above, it is none of our business. Many men are into cougars and many women like sugar daddies. Whatever floats their boat.
Legally, yes. You can’t and shouldn’t prevent them from dating.
But, it’s still creepy, it’s usually still predatory, and there can be a huge power imbalance. Basically, the main thing is whether either person can easily leave at any time - often the younger one can’t.
How is that any different than 18 year olds getting an apartment together and being too broke to easily move out if needed? And there are plenty of older people in the same boat financially. In fact most people live paycheck to paycheck.
I guess what you really mean is that poor people should only date other poor people, to make it a fair power balance. /s
I don’t know man. If at 50 I ran into a 20 something that was into dating me, I’d feel more like prey than a predator. But, who am I kidding? If the roles were reversed and I was a 20 something encountering a 50+ cougar, I’d still feel like prey. It’s definitely all about power dynamics, but I don’t think making assumptions about adult people’s situations based on age alone is appropriate or helpful.
I really wish people would stop parroting this bullshit “rule”, age-gap shaming is so fucking stupid
This (within reason and legality obviously)
It’s a case by case thing. Admittedly I’m defending myself here as I’m 41 dating 25 and I will never assume to be a good person or doing the right thing but am at least trying. Basically minding and respecting the gap but allowing the fact we fell in love to go ahead and happen.
- Both guys (idk, I heard age gaps are more common with gays anyway?)
- He was the one to approach me and ask me out, I’d thought about it but was reluctant to, turned out he got there first
- I check regularly that he’s happy and remind him of where the difference will be in 9 years for example
- It’s an open relationship, largely for his benefit and freedom (of course I get some fun too) and heck we’re not actually all that sexual between ourselves
- I’m not in any rush to pin him down, and often say he’s free to do what he wants, enjoy the 20s fully and decide for himself if he wants a future with me or not. If one day he finds someone closer in terms of age or distance and wants to let me go, of course I’ll be heartbroken but love and want the best for him so would respect the decision - hopefully ultimately remaining friends and lives made richer than when we started.
- To be honest, whilst I know it’s not a good thing, I’m a late bloomer, so in various ways kind of like the same age but sadly in an older body
I’m not gonna be like “oh I’m a good person so it’s fine”, I don’t know that. I might be an asshole. I can only try, based on things like the above, hopefully without being labelled something nasty.
(Who am I defending against anyway? Probably my own conscience.)
And if you’re 18, you can only date someone who is exactly 18. Can’t go any lower or any higher.
Idk who told this to me, but what a weird contradiction. I guess it sorta makes sense.
Nope. If your age minimum for a partner y is determined by your age x with the function:
y = 1/2 x + 7
then the point where y = x is at y - 7 = 1/2 x. Setting y to x leads us to x - 7 = x / 2, which happens at x = 14.
At x = 18, y = 18/2 + 7 = 9 + 7 = 16.
Relatedly, if we invert the function, y - 7 = 1/2 x, thus 2y - 14 = x, which gives us the theoretical maximum for a possible partner. If a possible partner is older than that, you’d be understood to call them a cougar, or whatever the male equivalent is.
Don’t you hate it when your 6 year old starts dating those people from the negative mirrorworld? No child of mine I say!
The rule is min: age/2+7, max: age*2-7, 36 -> min: 25, max: 65. 18 -> min 16, max 29.
The max age formula is pointless and contradicts the minimum age formula. For 29 the min age based on the min age equation is 21.5 which I’d say can be rounded up to 22, which sounds more reasonable than a 29 year old dating an 18 year old, which isn’t illegal sure, but I’m sure plenty of people would be raising an eyebrow at it.
That max age equation would mean that a max age for 14 would be 21. In contrast the min age for a 21 year old is 17.5, which can be rounded up to 18. Yymv on that one in particular, but I’m sure we can all agree that a 21 year old dating an 18 year old is a lot less sus than them dating a 14 year old. The minimum age formula seems fine enough on its own, not necessarily a universal rule but enough of a guideline to go by.
That max age formula is pointless and contradicts the minimum age formula. For 29 the min age based on the min age equation is 21.5 which I’d say can be rounded up to 22, which sounds more reasonable than a 29 year old dating an 18 year old, which isn’t illegal sure, but I’m sure plenty of people would be raising an eyebrow at it.
That max age equation would mean that a max age for 14 would be 21. In contrast the min age for a 21 year old is 17.5, which can be rounded up to 18. Yymv on that one in particular, but I’m sure we can all agree that a 21 year old dating an 18 year old is a lot less sus than them dating a 14 year old. The minimum age formula seems fine enough on its own, not necessarily a universal rule but enough of a guideline to go by generally. If you want to calculate based on the younger age, just re-arrange the formula. With the older age being AgeO and the younger age being ageY, you go from ageY = (AgeO/2) + 7 to AgeO = (ageY - 7)*2.
The opposite of age/2+7 is (age-7)*2, not age*2-7. I.E. the min age for a 29-year-old would be 21, not 18, and the age whose min is 18, I.E. the max for an 18-year-old, would be 22.
These were originally labeled “56” and “17” because a Libertarian made the image.
I brutally kill 36 year olds too, usually by gassing them with RAID for trying to escape my basement.
