My parents and I don’t speak at all. They’re very Mormon, and I’m incredibly gay. I was excommunicated at 15 and kicked out of my home - living out of a car (illegally) or on friends’ couches. My mom still occasionally reaches out to me and tries to explain that if I just don’t act on my “urges” then I can be part of the family again. So uh, yeah.
It’s made it very difficult to rely on anyone or really trust people in general.
Well being disowned by my father when I came out of the closet really put a damper on things. And my mom passing away really didn’t help open the lines of communication either.
How has it shaped me as a person? My wife has to regularly reassure me that she loves me and is keeping me so there’s that. Also I’m on therapy waiting lists.
My parents fell into conspiracy theories during the pandemic. My mum has been kind of conspiratorial for a while but kept it hush. My dad is very loud about it. They have entrenched themselves into the community. They live with several other people on their property who believe the same. They have attended anti-vax protests and have demonstrated. My dad shares this shit on Facebook all the time.
How has it changed me? I think it has improved my researching, scientific literacy, and critical thinking skills. Whenever they send things through, I go and look at the sources they provide. I have noticed a pattern. Whenever they use sciency sources, they are almost always:
- misinterpreted
- misrepresented (taken out of context)
- or they outright lie about the contents of the source
The speed at which you can spread misinformation is much faster than the rate you can debunk it, so I don’t do it so much to try to change their mind but more to learn about and keep informed on the science myself.
I don’t know what to do. We are on good terms and I just try not to talk about it or ignore their remarks. I’m not good in real-time “debates”; I feel much more comfortable taking my time and writing responses or findings. My dad is also very assertive to the point of aggressiveness in real-time discussions, so I get a bit intimidated. Sometimes they surprise me with reasonable takes that remind me that they do actually have values.
I think one of the key points of parent-offspring relationships is modeling. I didn’t have great parents and after some early struggles, I have learned what NOT to do. I try to shun violence, judgement, cruelty, substance abuse, etc for empathy, open communication, understanding, and friendship.
I had a neglectful single mother and it has resulted in 1) me being independent to a fault and 2) me not being comfortable interacting in family settings (friends’ and significant others’ families).