In an editorial published last week titled, “If Attitudes Don’t Shift, A Political Dating Mismatch Will Threaten Marriage,” The Washington Post’s editorial board points out that political polarization in this country has reached the point where it is now a prominent, often decisive factor in determining who Americans settle on as their potential mates. They emphasize this trend is now so acute it may actually threaten the institution of marriage as a whole. In particular, it seems that Democratic women are rejecting potential Republican suitors not only for marriage but as relationship material, all across the board. The message the editorial conveys—perhaps hyperbolically, perhaps not—is that as a consequence of this shift in attitudes, marriage itself in this country is in jeopardy.
If walked around naked down 5th avenue, trowing literal shit at everyone that I don’t agree with, I feel like the coverage wouldn’t be the same to me as it is for MAGA heads.
I mean, they don’t care for many people around except themselves, most of the ones I’ve known are creepy as hell, especially arround girls.
They treat everyone like if they were the most intelligent person who even lived …if that person was a dumb asshole…
So if I’m arround acting like shit, don’t say ohhhh he can’t find a gf. Instead try to say: put on clothes, shit goes in the toilet and comes out of your ass not in your mouth.
Edit: disclaimer; to all those incapable of using comedy and satire, methaphores and exageration(wich makes a good satire).
I will count you downvoats as a sign that you are in fact illiterate
Good! Less americans in the future!
I don’t really understand the fear mongering going on here. It’s not like if we decline past a certain level of marriages that all of a sudden marriages would go extinct. People who want to get married will still get married and people who don’t, won’t.
But I mean, even if they did, would we really be losing much anyway? Marriage has never quite made sense to me other than for tax purposes (which is a pretty cruddy reason to formalize being with someone forever imo)
It’s always seemed super short sighted. People change. And you can’t predict how they may change. Your partner that you love now could end up changing into someone you no longer love or worse. Committing to forever is just promising that you’ll stay with them even if they make you profoundly unhappy. I’ve only got this one life to live. I’m not commiting all of it to someone I may not like being around later on.
You left out the most important part.
Kids.
Yes, people’s attitudes change. You can undo everything else, but there is one thing you cannot undo: kids. There’s no going back from having a child, being a father, being a mother. Sure, there’s visitation, but that just sucks for everyone, especially the child.
Marriage is not so much a lifetime commitment to a spouse, as it is a commitment to the children you would eventually nurture.
As someone who grew up with divorced parents my biggest concern was having to deal with twice as many holiday parties. Do not stay together because of kids. If you actually care about your kids then split up and don’t try to use the kids as a barganing chip in the divorce. Be willing to work with the other parent on custody. Accept that you both need to spend time with your children (assuming there is no abuse going on). But growing up in a house with parents that hate each other is a good way to fuck up your kids for life.
Do not stay together because of kids.
yup. lived through two divorces; it’s not doing anyone any favors.
one, the kids can see it coming, unless they’re infants they know something is hinky and lying to them rarely works.
two, each individual now feels repeatedly obligated to try to make it work, to stifle the feelings they may have elsewhere or skip out on social events etc.,
I’ve never seen it work well, but boy howdy have I seen it work exceptionally poorly.
I disagree, as a parent you can have children, but you’re stuck with your spouse for potentially the rest of your life. Your kids will probably move out of your house at some point, pursue careers and start their own families. Your kids are not going to live with you forever.
I have no interested in marriage and I find the concept absolutely bonkers. I shouldn’t be financially and legally bound to someone to be their romantic partner. Been with my SO 16 years and we have a home, absolutely not interested in having kids and have never had any reason for marriage.
And if he ever has any medical or other kind of debt I won’t be responsible for it. I won’t be responsible for his funerary expenses etc and vice versa. I should not be responsible for someone I didn’t birth. He’s been there while I recovered from surgery at the hospital. Being married does nothing. He is listed as the one getting my life insurance and will get my savings if something happened to me. No kids, no exes, nobody to try and contest it. And if something changed I don’t have to worry about ‘divorce’ and all that bullshit. What’s mine is mine, what’s his is his. He can use my debit card if he wants and I can cut access with a press of a button if we somehow broke up, which won’t happen but still, it would be a clean break unlike married couples. Marriage is pointless.
I should not be responsible for someone I didn’t birth.
ah, a hopeless romantic I see.
On the one hand, logically, I completely endorse your freedom and resolve.
On the emotional side, I just want people to find the other people that make them happy. Doesn’t have to complete you, doesn’t have to fill your soul with music or balance your strengths and shortcomings, they just need to be able to make you feel happy. I desperately wish there was some way to help people find these others, because there’s so many amazing people I know that are lonely, but shouldn’t be.
have a good night.
You’re missing an important part in what marriage does: Formal representation for each other, may it be law or health. That means you have someone can make decisions for you if you’re not able to (or get information about your where abouts). If both expect to stay together some time it simplifies a lot of things.
And if it turns out you don’t like each other anymore, there is always the option to get divorced.
When this editorial came out a few days ago, I decided to cancel my WaPo subscription as the straw that broke the camel’s back. I have been a subscriber for years, but I cannot deal with this ridiculous agenda they are pushing over and over again. Marriage isn’t a default good thing. People should choose if they want to be married or not. If the institution is failing because women are making a feminist choice to take care of themselves, let it fail. They push this line over and over again and as someone who divorced a bad male partner, it’s NOT OK.
Yeah, literal Nazi ideology. Treating women as brood mares to make sure your toxic ideology can continue.
Oh it’s not ideological per se. They just want the labor force to produce more labor units. That’s just business.
I don’t agree with how it’s presented in the article, but I do agree that declining marriage rates can be as much of a good sign as much as it’s bad.
It’s a great thing that more people, especially women, are able to decide if marriage is the right choice for them. It’s a bad thing that for people who are interested in marriage or a lifelong partner, it is becoming increasingly difficult to find a partner. There is a loneliness epidemic going on, and it is getting increasingly difficult to get to know people due to rising work hours, burn out, lack of public and walkable spaces, lack of vacation days, rising costs of living, political radicalization, social distancing during covid, mental health decline, dating culture, gendered expectations, and so on.
It’s not a bad thing that people are remaining single, it’s a bad thing that for some people this choice was made for them due to the circumstances they are in. Ideally, people would get to decide whether they want to stay single or get married. Right now the options are stay single or go through the ever increasing hurdles of finding a partner when you are already struggling to get by yourself.
When people are happy, have healthcare, affordable housing, and livable wages, marriage is much more affordable. Right now, we have none of that and declining marriage rates are as much a sign that marriage has become optional as it has become non-viable.
If only we could breed out that stupidity, like an inverse Idiocracy. Still, props to those American women with standards.
Don’t worry they’ll have 10 kids in each household so they won’t die out.
Huh, I wonder if that subtly influenced the whole “first born son inherits the land, younger brothers get shipped off to the clergy” thing back in feudalism.
Not just per household. I know one who shit talks previous women he kept sleeping with, knowing they wanted kids when he didn’t, because the women kept the kids. I learned he was a Trump supporter because we talked about abortion when federal rights were removed. He had many opinions that don’t make sense individually, but upon my promoting he admitted he wanted control and men should have the full right to decide what happens to a women’s body, either the dad or the man who she is currently sleeping with, those two can determine what happens to her, but women should have no autonomy. He isn’t the smartest and I’m sure was repeating what others have told him, but the entitlement is intense.
