Hiya girlies!
From tomorrow I am visiting my partner’s highly Catholic, Eastern European parents, so I will have to pretend to be a boy for like two weeks straight.
I already know I’m gonna feel disgusting when I get back.
So what things do you do to feel cute and feminine? I’d love to have some nice things to try when I am safe again.
Thank you <3
I’m a female at birth, so not sure if I’m supposed to comment here, but I was just telling my husband earlier this week that layering makes me feel distinctly feminine! I wore a slip with a bit of lace at the bottom hem, and then a slightly shorter slip with extra fabric at the hem, then a dress over both for Thanksgiving for flowy peak a boo layers. The act of putting on several beautiful and soft and lovely layers that were pointless beyond being pretty made me feel so happy and girly :)
I hope you can find some stuff that makes you feel happy and girly :)
If it were me, I’d be wearing thigh highs and/or panties under my boyclothes >:)
But to answer your question:
Painting nails, a classic.
Cleaning, trimming and filing nails to make them look nice.
Relaxing in a nice long bath.
Shaving or otherwise removing body hair.
Put a ribbon or flower in your hair!
Gosh now I regret forcing myself not to buy thigh highs or skirts or anything until I lose weight hehehe~
The comfy warm bath and shaving session does sound perrrrfect though, all the steam and soft girl smells (:
If you’re going to do your nails, treat yourself to a crystal/glass file. They don’t cost loads (I got a “Mont Bleu” set of 3 off amazon for less than £10, they look like this😏) but seriously - not only are they so much smoother to use, they really help stop them breaking and fraying as much at the tips, so they can grow longer and stronger!
I know from experience gaining and losing weight that my legs aren’t getting smaller. I’ve bought some of my bottoms with stretchiness and ties so they are one size too big but fit fine, and just hoping my jeans that are one size too big can get shrunk by bathing with them on in hot water, or whatever. My one skirt has an elastic waistband. You could consider it once you’re feeling girly and taken care of.
I’m sorry you have to suffer this.
As an ally I’d suggest, all the things my wife loves, in the hope that it may help?
Subversive- wear your best silky underwear, hidden so the fam won’t know.
Overt — before and after; tea, a long indulgent bath and self care, mani - pedi (maybe best for after)
I hope any of this helps.
I’m not trans, so I apologize if this advice is misplaced but I recently bought a soft, fuzzy, pink and purple nightgown that came with thigh high striped socks. I love to put it on after a long hot shower. I feel so cute and girly and silly when I am wearing it, and it’s surprisingly warm!
Ngl I wouldn’t do that for a partner. Not a chance. I don’t have family in my life. No future partners of mine will meet my family. I don’t have to meet my partners’ families. I wouldn’t make myself miserable for two weeks minimum for any family. Not a chance I would do this. You say “when I am safe again.” I wouldn’t be with a partner who wanted me to feel like that for their comfort.
In this regard I am fortunate in that I am still very early in my transition, my girl voice is very bad and embarrassing, I can’t really present feminine yet, I still have a very long way to go. So it’s uncomfy to pretend nothing is going on, but it’s not gonna really hurt me.
I don’t think I’ll be visiting them again after this time though.
How do I draw such a bold line in the sand as you? My pre-HRT transition so far has been full of compromises, slowing the pace, of course not starting hormones, and I’m sort of… Queermoding, like I’m visibily queer but not trying to pass, either, and going by a gender neutral name and male pronouns rather than just being honest. I’m in the east coast US, there is no safety issue. My Mom is my only family, and she accepts me, but makes me extremely miserable.
